Rest in Peace
Ms. Tigger and I on the happiest day...
Retarded Unicorns Are Cool
I just finished watching the Presidential debate. I think that Kerry did a great job a putting Bush in his place. Sorry, call me a liberal bitch. I so don't care. Oh well, I'm not here to talk about politics. I'm voting and I know who I'm voting for. Do you?
I just felt like typing a little to talk about my awesome day off. What did I do today? I had sooo much fun. I got to wake up and go put gas in my little golf cart/Miata. I then went to the grocery store. I then got to go by one of my doctor's office and make a payment on my bill from hell. (That was lovely.) At least my balance is slowly getting lower. After that I came home. As I pulled in, PS was leaving to go see his Brazilian gymnist in Memphis. FUN! I hope that they have a wonderful evening b/c mine has freaking sucked harded than any porn star has ever sucked on a 12 inch penis! (I'm a pervert. I thought that you knew that!)
I got home and cleaned the house. I washed my work clothes. I washes 3,472 towels. I washed dishes for 2 hours!!! Two hours, people, that's a damn long time to wash fucking dishes. It was basically a bunch of glasses. We just have a little sink that doesn't hold much and there were dirty dishes everywhere. I just couldn't look at them any longer. Not to mention, I had no plate to make my pb and j sandwich. That was dinner. I haven't felt much like eating these days.
It's like my medication is making me smoke more and eat less. It did this months ago. I don't know if I mentioned it or not. I'm seeing a Neurologist at the end of October. They are going to try and put me on different medication that will control my seizures, but not make me sooo loopy. This Neurontin is making me feel drunk and tired 24/7. That's not good when you're trying to wait tables and get off from work at 1am.
I'm off to watch Eternal Sunshine. PS rented it and said that it was great. I've never seen it, so it better be worth my 2 hours of valuable fucking time.
Scoop The Poop, TUESDAY!!!
Don't Hate Me Because I'm Beautiful, Hate Me Because I'm A bitch
I just got home from work about 30 minutes ago. My Lord, please let me get the pharmacy job that I interviewed for! This waiting tables bullshit is wearing me out! I worked today from 10:30-4:00 and had to be back at 5:oh. It's a damn good thing that I live like 8 miles away or I would be totally pissed at that little hour break. I just came home today and took off the nasty work clothes and put on something comfy. I then went and sat on the swing to just chill before what I knew was going to be a night from HELL!!! People at work, some people, just drive me fucking crazy. I swear some of them act as if they are retarded. I made a whole $150.00 from working ALL day. (I don't know if any of you wait tables or have, but that sucks!) I work at a nice restaurant and constantly have people tell me that I was the best waitress they've ever had and even fill out the little comment cards to give to the manager to let them know just how fabulous
that I am, BUT anyway, they do this, and then go and tip me 4 fucking dollars on a 75.00 tab! WTF??? Tomorrow better be, well, it better be better or I'm going to be sitting here tomorrow same bat time, same bat place taking it out on my Precious. Scoop The Poop, fixing to!!!
No More Retro Toyland
Our home will now be referred to as the Spider Palace
. I believe that they are the only things holding this place together. There are sooo many webs outside that I don't even want to go smoke, but I manage. I took PS's flashlight from his camping trip. It is now my spider light for smoking at night. PS's ripped down their webs the other day and they were back that night. I told him that we should just make friends b/c I really do think that they have it out for PS, but don't tell him. I saw them all gathering together earlier around his car. I could just hear whispers, but I think that I heard something about putting an egg sack in his car or a big mac or something like that! I wanted to put this on my previous post, but it wouldn't let me. I got home about 12:30 and am having a beer. I know, I know, I shouldn't, but, it's been a hell of a fucking day. Scoop The Poop And Tell Your Mamma, I Said: How She Doing?!!!
Oh, My Aching Ass!!!
Ok, I fell at work again yesterday in the exact same spot that I fell on about a week ago. Now that whole area on the left side of my body that's like from the hip to the knee is purple, black, a lovely shade of green, and VERY swollen. This sucks big ones. I mean, I was just healing up from the last fall and what do I do? I bust my ass bigger than shit yesterday even worse than before. Urrr! I'm off tomorrow. That's a good thing. I'm just going to lay around the house and not do shit. Maybe if I take an easy and feel better than the rest of my work week won't suck. I say this b/c as of now, it does. (This still will not let me move to a new paragraph. I need to see what's up with that.) Until then, I'll just do this. Well, PS went to Memphis again Saturday. He got to see Joey and was beaming, no, he was glowing when he got home. I'm sooo glad that he got to see him. I swear, last night Joey called and PS saw that it was him and lit up like a freaking Christmas tree. It was the cutest thing. He then turned red and went out to the porch to talk to his sexy Brazilian gymnast. Gay men have all of the luck. They do! All of the good ones are either taken or gay. Lately, I'm just starting to think that they are all gay. Everything is going well on this end. We're pretty much moved in. We just need to get on the painting kick now. I do plan on at least going over the wicker with some more white paint tomorrow. Who knows, maybe, I'll start on the door. I doubt it, but it could happen. Gotta run. Late for work!!!!!!!!!!!! Scoop the poop, hurry!!!
Ivan, Ivan, Ivan
Man, this hurricane Ivan has already started winds up to like 50 miles an hour here. I've been sitting on the porch swing. I love it! When the sun set, it was so Tim Burton like. It was a blackish-blue sky with just a little orange set behind of all of our creepy trees that I just love. But yeah, Ivan. It's some pretty serious shit. This is a level 5 hurricane, though I don't know much about a hurricane unless it's from Pat O's in New Orleans. Accoring to the weather dude, level 5 is pretty fucking high! There are so many people in town. You can't even get a hotel room here. I heard that a lot of people were headed up to Memphis. Good luck to you all.
Speaking of Memphis, PS got back from his trip today. He and Joey had such a good time. I watched the video. I really do wish that I could've gotten of work. Oh, well, Joey, If you are reading, and I know you are b/c you love me. I just wanted to say "hi!' and also thank you for being such a gentleman with my baby. From what I saw on the video, you're a very kind person. I do hope to see you camping soon. Bye!
Just a few things that have been on my mind that I've been meaning to post, but always forget. BUT. Now they have popped in my head, so here they are:
1. Why is there always just one shoe in the road? I mean, what happened to
cause this? I just don't get it. I know you've seen the one shoe in or on the
side of the road. WTF?
2. What's the deal with that fucking shake machine at EVERY Mc Donald's?
I don't care what time of day it is, what time of year it is, but EVERY time
I go to order a shake from Mc D's. (Countryside, Everywhere!) I always get
this back. "Our machine broke!' Really? Try it, go to Mc Donald's and
order a shake. If you get one than you live in an area where your Mc D's
rocks. They totally suck here, but I do have to have it every now and then.
Just b/c I know that sooo many of you are truly concerned about Miss Tiger's well being. She loves it here. She settled in the first night that she was here and since has ruled the roost. Actually, she's in my lap right now. OH, this week is turning out to be so stressful, we have PS's party friday and Miss T gets her shots saturday and I work ALL day and most of the night sunday. This sucks! I just really need some more cash to go towards the party, cake, balloons, etc. Ummm, yeah! If you would like to send me like 10 thousand dollars, just email me and I'll give you my address.
I'm fixing to go back and sit on the swing b/c this weather is so cool.
Scoop the poop, not today!!!
I Smell Good On The Swing
Written on 09-14-04 @ 4pm
I was sitting on the porch swing this morning drinking my caffeine and having a Red when I just had the greatest feeling. I realized that I was sitting on my (our) swing that's on our cute BIG porch, leading you into our lovely old New Orleans type feel of our home. Ooops, I meant our Retro-Toyland! Heee! I just love that. If you don't, than just GO AWAY NOW!
M'kay! It just like really hit me, you know, this is our home and I really do love it. It's going to be sooo beautiful by the time we have it all painted. I simply can't wait. I can not express how happy I am to you at this particular moment in time. (This time tomorrow, I'm sure that I'll be in a totally different mood, Of course, I will. I am a female, aren't I?)
I actually got many errands accomplished today. I'm so proud of me. Can I get a Wahoo!? "Wahoo!" Thanks. I went by Old Navy
to grab a few shirts for work. I then went to the mall and found my Sept. LP's gift for this month and I must say that I rock
b/c I found it. This stuff has been discontinued, but I got the hook up. I got her lots! (If this doesn't make her extremely happy, then I'll just have to take a trip and kill her at once!) Ok, new people or crazy people, I'm making a JOKE by saying that I'll kill my LP. Sense of humor, though dark, get it? I also had to stop by the Gap
. I mean, it was right there calling me. "NN, you NEED more Dream products, come on, come on in baby and smell oh-so-swell. Come, darling! ...Hi! NN, good to see you!"
I ended up buying one of each thing the they had in my Dream. I only wish that they would start carrying the shower gel again. I like to layer my smells, DAMN IT! This stuff smells so good. Gap Dream
and Victoria's Secret Pink
are my 2 most favorite smells. I usually wearing one or the other. I must say that I just got out of the shower and I smell pretty darn good! Scratch and sniff your screen and smell me! Mmmm! Isn't it fabulous?
Scoop the poop, done!!!
A Moment Of Time
I worked really late last night and then had to be back there today at 10am and didn't get to leave until like 4pm. It really sucked. I just thought that I'd do a little entry here to let everyone know how proud I am of me!!! I've paid my rent for the month. (as long as he gets it by the end of the month it's cool!) Just another advantage to having PS's bro as a landlord! Anyway, I went and got a few groceries today. (mostly strawberry and raspberry sorbet, but oh, well) I've got plenty of cash saved up for the party and for Miss Tigger's shots that she gets the next day. She will probably hate us by the end of the week. This damn blogger will not let me move to another paragraph. Don't ask, b/c I sure don't know WTF's going on here. PS is leaving in the morning when he gets off from work to drive to Memphis and go camping with a friend. I wanted to go, but I couldn't exactly take the whole week off. I hope that he has a good time. He's earned it!!! He's been saying that he wants to go camping, so off he's going. I'd like to go, but, I'd prefer to stay in a little cabin or something more "bug proof". I don't like them, but for some reason, they love the taste of me. That's about all that's been going on lately, we're still getting settled in, but it's totally awesome!!! You must come to Jackson and visit the Retro-Toyland Palace. I just had to add this in here, but J! E! T! S! Jets! Jets! Jets! Go team go! They kicked ass today!!! Waahooo!!! Scoop no poop today!!!
My Fair Lady
Written on 09/08/04 @ 1:17am
I wasn’t really sure if I felt like writing or not. I’m so tired and tonight is my first night to get off from work and come home to an empty house. That sucks something’s balls!!!
I’m just not used to it (our house) yet. I’m not used to the new noises or the railroad track. Things like that. Example: When you are washing and drying your clothes, the house starts shaking. Crazy, huh? Though, I do love this place. It is already coming along smoothly. I think that by the time we get finished with EVERYTHING it will be won-der-ful!!!
I had a really funny story about my period, your period, his period, etc. It’s in one of my journals and quite frankly, I’m too damn tired to look them up. Anyway, the part that I do remember was writing about how my Aunt Mary came to visit me twice last month. She’s a “bloody bitch”. That was so super fab of her to think of me like that. Then, I thought to myself that I’ve never really called it (your period, your thing, whatevah) anything like a name. Then, I came up with her name. She will now be referred to as Eliza Doolittle. Yes, it’s from one of my all time favorite movies and is the name from one of the most beautiful people to walk this earth. I love me some Audrey Hepburn. I love that name. Eliza starts off slow, but conquers all in the end, just like me, my period, and my vagina. Heee!!!
I’m really tired y’all and I have to work like 12hrs tomorrow, so give my writing a break, I think that it’s funny and like I’ve said many times before, if you don’t like it, DON”T READ IT!!!
Scoop the poop, now, and then go clean that tub, bitch!!!
Happy Birthday To Youuu...
Written 12:26am Saturday Night (yes, I’m home alone and it sucks donkey balls)
I was just watching Dazed and Confused and had not seen it in sooo long that I forgot that one of my all time favorite actresses was in it. Parker Posey, who else? She said the funniest thing and I just have to put it on here. Miss Posey, “Wipe that face off of your head, Bitch!” I’m going to start saying that one to everyone that gives me an eat shit look, a WTF? look, an I wanna get in your pants look, a smile or something that looks like one. I guess that I’m just going to say it to anyone that looks at me. Ok. Enough of that!
It is officially PS’s birthday. He’s now the big 23. He makes me feel so old. He was going out to hit the gay bar and I sooo wanted to go, but I’m still hurting from my fall at work yesterday. I don’t know if I told you about it or not, but I basically fell feet first onto my left side. I have a bruise on my hip bone that is as big as a grapefruit or maybe a large orange. My legs are just black, blue, and green with bruises all over them. The shittiest is that I think that I may have a few bruised ribs also. Everyone keeps telling me to go to the doctor. Umm, yeah, go to the doctor, wait for hours, see doc. for all of 5 minutes, and let him tell me that I’m bruised! (NO SHIT!) Then he’ll probably give me some kind of prescription for some pain medicine that will take the pain away, but in return, it’ll make me vomit. No thank you! I think that I’d rather sit here in our home, play with Precious, take some Ibuprofen, and get an ice pack for the ribs. Now, that sounds a hell of a lot better than sitting in a waiting room doesn’t it?
I hope that my baby has a fab-u-lous birthday. He deserves it. After everything that he’s done this week, he needs a good fun night out. I mean, he’s gotten his room completely set up, the living room, bathroom (kinda), and now he just needs to get his cute little ass in there and make our kitchen purdy. I think that will be my birthday present to him; he can work on the kitchen ALL day!!!
Scoop the poop, but not on your birthday!!!
The Cushions Tried To Eat Us!
This was written early this morning at like 10 or 11ish am, just so you know. M'kay!
I just woke up about an hour ago. Maaan, PS and I have a lot of stuff. A LOT! We are now moved in our new house. I think that last night we decided to refer to it as Retro-Wonderland or Retro Toyland or something. I’ll let you know. My brain is dead right now and needs to wake up soon b/c I have to be at work at 5pm. We’ve pretty much gotten everything moved in and most of it unpacked. Hell, I came home from work Wednesday and he’d already started painting the bathroom. My baby looked like a Smurf had shit on him. It was the cutest.
We’ve made lots of progress considering Monday and Tuesday we got everything moved in and now it’s Friday and already starting to feel like home. There is just one thing missing. My baby, Miss Tigger is staying at my parents until Sunday. That is my next full day off and I still have some boxes at their house to pick up anyway. I plan to wake up early, really early. For Sunday is also PS’s 23rd birthday. I’m going to have his room filled up with balloons when he opens his eyes and we’ll be having a small breakfast birthday cake. I don’t want to get a big one b/c we’ll have one at his party which is on the 17th. Our house will be open to guests by then. I mean it looks great now, but we really don’t want to entertain until it is finished! Down to the last knick-knack or candle being put out.
We are both about to die. We don’t have internet until Monday. I just know that I’m going to have 10,000 freaking emails that I won’t read. Don’t you hate that? Oh well, I love our house and will post photos when we get it all hooked up. OH MY GOD! You should have seen PS and me carrying my sofa. It was the funniest thing ever. First of all, that bitch was heavy and second, the cushions kept falling in our faces and tried to eat us! Not to mention that is was like 6am and we’d been moving since about 3pm the day before. Our brains and bodies were shut down. I guess that the cushions picked up on how totally exhausted we were and thought that they would take advantage of us and eat us, but we quickly got away! Oh, and if I only had a picture of me driving the Ryder truck. (To die for, priceless.) I looked like a, well; I looked like a short little lady driving a big ass truck. I was scared to death EVERY time that I had to drive it, but I got some big balls, or so I like to think that I do, anyway, I drove that bitch and didn’t have any accidents. I think that I did well considering I’m used to driving Christopher (my Miata). It felt sooo good to get back to him after we dropped the truck off. I felt as if I could fly or something. I don’t know how many of you girlie girls out there, like myself, have ever driven a big ass Ryder truck, but go do it and then tell me how scared you were.
Now, I have to go and put clothes in the dryer and relax a little before I get ready to go to work. Later!!!
Scoop the poop, where is it?