Rest in Peace


Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket Ms. Tigger and I on the happiest day...
Sunday, January 30, 2005
  Sunday Bloody Sunday
Well, Tigger isn't doing so well. My dad had to come over this morning and help me with her meds. MCM is on his way over to help me give her her last dose. Wish us luck. Sorry that I haven't written much, but, obviously, I've had a close eye on my baby. We go back to Dr.NNNN in the morning. Again, wish us luck! I've just been crying and crying. I don't even want to think about life without her. Enough of that.

I'm going to New Jersey at the end of feb. I'll explain later! That state just happens to have the sweetest thing living there.

I'll give you an update on what Dr.NNNN said when we get home tomorrow.

Scoop, what?
Saturday, January 29, 2005
  Are All Of These Scratches That I'm Getting While Forcing Vodka Down Tigger's Throat Going To Leave Scars?
I was up most of the night last night. I think I finally fell asleep at 4am. I then woke up at 7am to give Miss T her food, water, and meds. This is NOT fun. She's scratching the hell out of my poor hands. She seems to be acting a little better today. She's moving around more. Oh, oh, oh, and she has tinkled twice since my last post!!! That made me feel a little better. She has yet to give me a kiss. (lick my face) She does it all of the time.

I've got a buzz from hell right now. I got up b/c Eliza had her shoes in my stomach again. This bitch is kicking my ass today. Anyway, I had a Mepregan, from when I had my tooth pulled a months ago. You know what I did? I took that fucker! It's just starting to kick in. I'm seeing like 3 computers. Craziness!

I'm just sitting here listening to Annie Lennox's Medusa. (one of my single favorite cds) I just felt like posting, so here I am. I think that I might go and pick out a dvd and watch a movie. Oh, yeah, I'll watch Troy. I've never seen it. My Mom bought it and while I was at her house yesterday I took it. Hey, she borrows dvd's from me all of the time. I do plan on returning it to her. Besides, she's in Cincinatti (sp?) WKRP! (As a child, that was my fav. show. I even had a WKRP t-shirt!

I guess that I'm off to watch my movie and probably end up falling asleep. I do have to be awake at 6pm to make sure PS gets his sick ass out of bed. He's relly trying to make it on time. We'll see!

Oh! I did call dr.dumb ass vet today. He conviently couldn't speak to me at the moment. If I don't get him today, trust me, I'll call mon. I might just even stop by there on our way to see Dr.NNNN. I'll throw a fit in their waiting room. I really don't think that they want that, BUT, if I have to, I surely will! He's got his coming b/c Karma's a bitch!

Scoop the Poop!!!
Friday, January 28, 2005
  Ladies Restroom To The Right
Tigger just pissed!!! Hooray! That's definitely worthy of a post. That means that her kidneys are working, if only a little. I'm sooo excited. I have no one in my life, but my PS. So, I called him at work and told him. I know he's ever so happy. I know I am. TTFN. I'll definitely be back later.

Keep in mind that I've cried all day and just broke down in the bathroom. So, I decided to get drunk. I just went and got me a sixer. I just wanted to warn you that my posting may be, well, it may be drunk!

Scoop the Poop, Hell Yeah!!!
  Get Well Soon, PLEASE!!!
We (Tigger and I) left the house at about 8am. We just got home at 6pm. (nope, not working tonight!) I would probably have a nervous break down. I went and picked up HH on the way there for moral support. We made it there right on time. I pretty much gave Dr.NaNuNaNu (his name is Robin Williams) the run down about the past month. He said that I would have to leave her there for a few hours while he does bloodwork, gets results, and gives her an IV.

HH and I decided to just go to Mom's and wait there instead of spending 3 hours in Wal-Mart. We went back to pick her up. I spoke with Dr. NNNN and he's thinking that she has a kidney disease. He said that she's been a sick kitty for a while. This didn't just come out of nowhere. What I want to know is why in the fuckity fuck fuck did the dr. that removed her tumor tell me that all was fine? You stupid, FUCKER!!! Don't think for half a second that my ass isn't going to be on the phone with him in the morning at 8am asking questions, screaming, and maybe even threatening a lawsuit! And, I'm sooo not fucking around here! If dr. dumbass would have found this, we could have at least started her on meds like Ummm 20 FUCKING days ago!!! I want to scream! Aaahhh! (just did, now my throat hurts. ha.) He sent me home with some meds. I have to give her 10cc's of calcium, an antibiotic, and protein twice a day. He said fuck the Gatorade and to give her sugar water every hour. (6cc's) Oh, and all while still force feeding her. Needless to say, Miss Tigger isn't very happy with me at this moment in time.

Anyhow, this is where the shittyness starts. I have to take her back monday at 10am. If she hasn't improved, we're going to start more meds. If after that, she's still not feeling better, OOOOH, I must make "the decission" whether to have her put to sleep or not. I asked him today that even if the meds do work, honestly what did he think of her life expectancy? He said, that it didn't look good and probably not very long.

What in the hell am I going to do if I have to have her put to sleep? I know that some of you may think that I'm carzy, and, I really don't give a shit! Tigger has been with me for 11years now. We've grown up together. I honest to God love her more than most people I know. She's been sleeping under the covers with me for so long. PLEASE, God, if you're reading, make my baby well again. I've basically been crying my eyes out all fucking day just think about it. I guess it's good that I'm off work until tues. I can now be here to keep a watch over her. I just went to check on her. She's just laying on the blanky and sleeping. I brushed her hair. She loves that.

Last night, PS went to the store and got me some Mickey Mouse tissues. Sweet! When we got home today, he had a card for me. I opened it. It was a big Mickey on the front and inside said:

"This is probably a purkier card than the situation calls for, but I thought it might at least put a bit of a smirk on your face. Ya know I never actually disliked Tigger. I just liked saying stuff about her to get a rise out of you. I prayed for her today. Not sure if that'll be good or bad for her considering the source of the prayer, but maybe, because I am such a cynical sacreligious ass all the time, God will give you two a break due to this sinner's sincerity. Anyway, I am so sorry Tig wound up like this. I know that you and everyone else is too, but still. I love you Nataschia. If you need me, you know where I'll be. Sorry I wasn't all that concerned about her last night. I had decided a while back that after the nuclear winter, there will only be cock roaches, Cher, and Tigger. Oh and of course Spam. Mustn't forget Spam. Anyway, Love ya Sweety. I'm here if you need me. Preston"

The card did make me smile all while bursting into tears. Preston, I'm praying that God heard you today and hears me now. Anyhew, was that not the sweetest card or what? I love him soo fucking much. Thank you baby! I'm off to give Miss Tigger more water. I'm sure that I'll be back later. I seriously doubt that I sleep any time soon.

Scoop the Poop, done!!!
Thursday, January 27, 2005
  Not A Happy Cat
I just force fed Miss T her last dose of food and Gatorade for the night. It was pretty easy the first time, but now, I've got little scratch marks all over me. Anyway, I called work and told Lorena what happened. I told her that I may be late. I then called her back after talking to my Mom's vet. He said that he wanted to see her at 10am. He's going to run bloodwork and try to find out what in the fuck is going on. I called work crying b/c, basically the 2nd opinion vet told me that it sound like a kidney disease, and that it was very important for me to keep a close eye on her. He's actually scared that she may pass away before we get there. I don't remember being this scared in years.

I must go and snuggle with my Miss Tigger. TTFN!

  What The Fuck?
Ok, yesterday, I get home and PS is sick. Today, after although, Eliza came up to work, it was a grrreat day having Alice there. We left work and went by Target where I could get some Therma Care for Eliza. She really appreciates the person that invented them. Oh, and before I left the shopping center, I stopped by Pier 1 and got 3 cans of my Ginger Peach spray. I'd ran into Randolph (the only person that is still left from when I worked there) and he said they got some in this morning. They held them for me! I love Pier 1.

Anyway, my whole point being, is that how can a day start out so wonderful and end up so fucking shitty? I know that I've asked this before, but what's the answer? Shit Happens! P-lease! I got home and went into the bedroom to see that Miss T had thrown up. It looked black against the hard wood floor, but when I cleaned it up, it looked green. Almost like liquid grass, but she's had no grass. I then went to change her water and found that she really hasn't been eating or drinking much this week. I then freaked and called the vet. They said for me to get her up there asap. Off we went! My usually Dr. Vet wasn't there, so I got to see Dr. Idiovet instead. He gave her a shot for her nausea. It seems to have her moving around a little more. I have to take her back sat to see the real Dr. Vet at 8am. for bloodwork. I'm sure she's gonna love that!

Anyway, this fucking idiot tried to sit there and basically try and tell me that with her being an "old" cat, excuse me, Dr, Dumbass, but very pampered house cats can live to be in their late 20's, 11 years is not fucking OLD. Got it? I'm no vet, but even I know that. He was basically trying to prepare me for the worst and by saying that she's had a long life. Bullshit!!! This cat is only 11 and I'll be a damned crazy fucking bitch if I loose her now. I'm telling you, people, I treat her as a child. I love her! She's never left me and she' s not going to now.

Now listen to the treatment that we must follow until sat. At 7pm I gave her 9cc's of mushy prescription food followed by 10cc's of lemon-lime Gatorade. I have to do it again at 9pm, and again at 11pm. I then have to sit and watch her a see how she's acting. Did I mention that I work a double tomorrow? I have to get up at 7am and give her the usual feeding. Then, before I leave I have to give her 18cc's of food and the Gatorade. I have to give her 18cc's b/c I probably won't be home until after 11pm. I then have to start all over sat. Hopefully by then, she'll be eating or drinking on her own. God, I hope so! She's just laying in my lap now as I type. The poor baby. She really doesn't feel well. At least after tomorrow at work, I'm off until tuesday. I don't know how it happened. Don't ask. I know I'm not! At least I can be here with her. I just hope that I'm not the next one to get sick b/c I can't afford it!

Scoop the Poop and enjoy it, for you never know when it may be the last time that you scoop!!!
Wednesday, January 26, 2005
  I'm Not Getting Sick Like PS And Our "Precious". Nope, Not Gonna Do It!
Written at 5:30pm.

Our "precious" is sick at the moment, but I just had to write. I've had the most amazing day. My best female friend (Alice) came up to my work today. I thought that she was there to eat, NO, she was there to fill out a job app. Hooray!!! Oh, she also ate a lunch salad and the bitch tipped me 5 dollars, though, I told her not to tip me shit! I just love her. Anyway, Alice starts tomorrow at 10am. She'll only be working lunches mon-fri. I'm ever so happy that they hired her not only b/c she's one of my 2 friends, but b/c that's one more female that we'll have. With Alice, we now have 4. We will overcome!!! I'm sooo excited b/c we can ride to work together and stuff. Happiness!

I got home at about 2:30pm and the computer was just black. I was like, WTF? I then went into PS's room to ask him about it and also tell him that his sister-in-law was our newest employee. He (bless his heart) looked like total shit! I told him to go ahead and call work and tell them that he wasn't going to make it in tonight. His tonsils were so swollen that you could literally see his right one bulging from his neck. I looked like he'd swallowed a chicken bone / a rather large penis/ sumthing? I quickly gave him some money and he went to the doctor. Yep, he just called. He's got strep throat, VERY contagious!!! I guess that we won't be making out any time soon. That sucks b/c he's a grrreat kisser! (I know you thinking, how'd she know, but she knows, baby, trust me!) I guess that I'll have to play the part of the drunken nurse tonight. I've had 2 beers and am working on number 3! I have a very low tollerance. Hey, I'm a cheap date/drunk. Anyone? Anyone?

Anyhow, when I got off work I went by my Mom's work to pick up my package from my LP and finally see her hair. It looks 1000 times better than before. It truly looks like she cut 10 years off her age. I called her when I got home and reminded her of how fabulous that it looked and made her look so much younger! I could tell, as bah-hum-bug that she is, that she truly appreciated the compliment! Gotcha' Mom! I love me some Mom, you just don't know. That's it! I'm going to do an entry one day all about Mom. That way y'all can get a better understanding of her. You'll either love her and think that she's one strong tough little bitch or hate her b/c she's a hard core republican. It's up to you, but if you find yourself hating the woman that gave my awesome self the gift of life, P-lease, go away! I don't need you here. It was nice of you to visit, but you must be going NOW! 'Cause if you don't love Mom, you don't love me! Anyway, I totally loved her hair and am sooo glad that she went a chopping! Enough about her. She's an all day entry to herself!!!

My SLP, Dawn, sent me the most awesomely comfortable pair of slippers EVER! They are these HUGE pink Patrick (from SpongeBob, for the idiots out there) slippers that are squishy on the inside. They are so fucking comfy. I love them! I'm wearing them as I type. I wish that I could wear them to work, but I'm sure that they'd frown upon them and make me put my dress shoes back on. Oh well, I might wear them in and just see how long it takes before someone says something about them. Like, WTF is that on your feet? Heee! I'm such a pain in the ass, but you already know that. I hope!

It was like 70 something today. I left work with the top down. It was lovely! The fucking low tonight is 40 and the high for tomorrow is 50. What in the hell? I'm sooo confused. I never know what to wear anymore. Oh well, that's all part of living in the luvly south!

Scoop the Poop, tomorrow after work, I promise!!!
Tuesday, January 25, 2005
  Bebop Rocks!
Well, I'll start off by saying that it was quite a busy day, but I got lots done. I left work and went with Nicole to Applebee's to eat cheese stick's and mellow out. It was fun. I just love her and it sucks that she'll be moving to N.C. after she gets married in July. She's supper sweet! (and I'm going to catch the bouquet!)

After I left Nicole, I went to pay our electricity bill. (1,000 tons off shoulders there) I then stopped by our Asian food store. I think that I got one of each soup that they had and I was only going in to get some Pocky. For those of you that don't know Pocky, you must find it and try it. It's like cookies, but they are in sticks, not round. The strawberry is the bestest!!! I just stopped there to get PS some Pocky b/c he's the one that turned me on to it, and of course, some Pocky for myself! I didn't mean to buy everything that Anna showed to me, but it all looked so good, healthy, and low in fat. That should definitely be enough food to last me for at least a week, maybe two!?! Who knows?

I was in such a hurry to get home. I was susposed to go over to Alice's house and do laundry. I just wanted to have it done before Jack got home from a long hard day only to have to see my smoking ass. Yes, they are both trying to quit smoking at the same time. Al I have to say is, Good-Luck, 'cause that's hard as hell. They also seem to smoke a lot. I'm guessing about 2 packs a day each and they are quitting cold turkey, I've got crazy neighbors. I'm telling ya', I do, but they are wonderful.

I think that I'm fixing to go and wake PS and make sure that he makes it to work on time. (hold on, I know that's stupid, like we're on the phone? I'm just a crazy old fucked up lady, excuse it!) He said that he'd be up in 10 minutes. We'll see. He's always late for work and the last thing that we need right now is for him to loose his job. Oh...

Anyway, you know how I just went by our lacal record store, Bebop, yesterday and got my cd's. While I was there, I ordered the Derick and the Dominos cd. When I got home and checked my voice mail today, there was a message from them saying that it was in. Awesome!!! They have certainly gotten a lot faster on their ordering than they were 10 years ago when I worked there. Yes, I was that hippie chick that worked in the record store in 94 and 95! The restaurant that I work at now is in the same shopping center. It's soo funny b/c there is a Pier 1 there and I also worked there for like a year. I saw my old boss from Bebop when I was in there yesterday and we were laughing at the fact that I've worked in almost store in that shopping center and that I should, at least, have my own parking space or sumthin'!!! Heee! That's kinda weird b/c I just came to the realization that I've kinda grown up in that shopping center. I told you that my life is crazy!!!

PS just got up and is getting ready for work. I think that I'm fixing to listen to some Clapton that I've never heard. Maybe, I'll make some phone calls, don't hold me to it. I'll then see what the tele. has to offer and if nothing Miss T, Clapton, and I will be off to bed.

Scoop the Poop, tomorrow, tomorrow the sun...!!!
Monday, January 24, 2005
  Running On Faith
I've been trying to post for like an hour now and blogger was fucked. It finally started to work. Hooray! I got home from work a few hours ago. We were extremely s-l-o-w! I got to go home first b/c I work so many shifts this week and am already exhausted. I got a to go order to eat. I got blackened redfish, veggies, potatoes, and a salad for 8 bucks. Can't beat that.

I went to pick up my Fast Times At Ridgemont cd today. I found 2 Clapton cd's that I've never heard. Awesome!!! I also got Clapton Chronicles just b/c mine is worn out. Anyhow, I went there to get my Derek and the Domino's cd and they didn't have it. Urgggh! Oh well, I got four cd's for like 42 dollars. That's not bad at all. I guess that I'll just have to have them order it for me. I've got it on tape and on an albumn, but have no albumn player. I just want the damn cd, that's all!

I'm now listening to one of my Clapton cd's. It's playing the song, It's in the way that you use it. This is a total sex song to me. I mean, "it's in the way that you use it?" I could just jam to this song all night, but then I'd be wanting me some sex and that obviously ain't happeneing any time soon. It is a fuck song. Listen to it. Every guy that I've ever dated either thought that I was crazy for thinking of that or was like, oh, this song will put her in the mood!@?! Heee!!!

Oh, and the new guy at work, look like Hugh? I don't think so! The ONLY thing that they have in common is they both have brown hair and brown eyes. I'm really not quite sure how many beers Nicole had when she met him. She'd certainly had enough b/c her beer goggles were definitely on.

Going to leave you now and get ready for bed. Good-Night!

Scoop the Poop or just procrastinate about it like me!!!
Sunday, January 23, 2005
  Here's Johnny!!!
Written at about noon.

PS and I just had a sweet moment. We're not "those people." I love him and he loves me. I basically just broke down and started crying. I was (and have been) very depressed about being alone. I was in love once and remembering how sweet and wonderful that it was. I then told him that, "you know how people say that there's someone out there for everyone?" What if that's true, but it's not "forever"? It's just a beautiful memory that your left with while longing for that feeling again. What if I've already had my time with him and am never feel that happiness ever again? I also mentioned to him that I was upset that he and Father 'O didn't invite me out with them the other night. He just replied that I was always invited. He thought that I knew that was a given. That just touched my heart when he said that. As, we were both sitting there crying and telling eachother how much we meant to eachother and loved eachother; I told him to STOP IT! Leave! He was on his way to visit some friends in Hattiesburg. (For those of you that do or don't know anything about the NFL; that's where Green Bay's quarterback Brett Farve is from. Though I do prefer to call him Bubba. He just looks like someone that you'd call Bubba. You should hear some of the stories about his behavior, totally Bubba!) Anyhew, it was a sweet moment. He made it there safely, thank dog! He said that he'd be home tomorrow. Though I would love to have him here to watch Desperate Housewives, it's kind of a dangerous drive to make at night. Lots of people have lost their lives on that hwy at night.

I also think that with Eliza arriving any day now and thinking about turning 29 in less than 2 months (march 11th, for those of you that want to send gifts. heee!) is really starting to get to me. I'm just feeling that I'm getting old and will never be married or have a family. I've always wanted children. I want a minnie-me. I'm just sad. SHIT! I've got every fucking right to be for I'm fixing to start the last year of my life that will begin with the number 2. I seriously doubt that I see 200 or want to. For all of you young little chickens out there that think that I'm over reacting or crazy, just wait! Wait until you're cute, single, living with a gay man/your best friend, and you treat your cat as if she were you fucking child! Let me know how you're doing, M'KAY!?!

It's now 6:45 pm.

I just saw on tv that Johnny Carson passed away. No fucking way, man!!! That's sooo sad. I thought that he was pretty healthy. I remember watching him on the Tonight Show. (showing my age, see!) It's a weird feeling. He was just one of those icons that was susposed to live forever. I guess that his grieving young wife will just have to buy herself an island, move, and mourn in peace. Poor girl! (I know, I'm an evil bitch, but you already knew that!)

Have I ever mentioned to you that I HATE the Patriots? They're playing the Steelers now. I'm pulling for the Steelers, even though they beat my Jets last weekend. That should show you the extent of my hate for them. From what it looks like (unless the Steelers can pull a miracle from their assholes) our Super Bowl will be the Eagles and the Patriots. That sucks! I just want to be able to pull for a team that I give a shit about. I could care less for both, but GO EAGLES!!!

I actually left the house today. The hunger took over. I went and ate some chinese. It was yummy. I then, since I was right next to it and all, went to Stein Mart and bought myself a lovely pink tie for work. I have a navy blue one and would much rather wear pink. Nicole got the same exact one in red and told me that they had pink. I went there and they had ONE left. It was meant to be. It was also on sale for 12 dollars! Hooray for me! Oh My Dog!!! There's this new guy starting at work tomorrow and Nicole met him the other night. I was asking the usual. Is he cute? Was he nice? Etc... She said and I swear I'm not lying; "he looks like that guy that plays Wolverine in the X-Men, what's his name?" HUGH FUCKING JACKMAN!!! I'm anxious to get to work tomorrow and see just how Hugh he is. If he's cute, at least I'll have someone pretty to look at while at work! I'll let ya know!!!

Scoop the Poop, tuesday, promise!!!
  I Was Right
I woke up at like 8am. Full of energy and it's so freaking cold. I'm not doing a damn thing today. I'm not leaving the house. I'm not scooping the poop. Well, I might scoop, but I usually just dump it all out and fill it with new litter. I'm just not going to the store today. I'll be taking on a big cold task if I even decide to walk outside in this cold shit to take out the garbage.

This really pisses me off b/c this is my one day off and it's sooo cold that my fingers are hurting as I type. I'm going to lay under the electric blanket with Miss T. She's a smart one. I'll be back later if it warms up in this igloo that I live in.

Scoop the Poop?
Saturday, January 22, 2005
  Let It Grow...
Howdy, people! How are ya? Me, cold as a strawberry snow cone! It's 11pm. I just got home from work about 30 minutes ago. I'm sitting here with Miss T in my lap and listening to one of my Eric Clapton's G.H. cd's. I wanted to listen to the Derick and the Domino's cd. As I looked for it, I realized that it was gone. That's like my fav-o-rite albumn that he's ever done and my dumb ass has lost it. Grrreat, I guess that I'll now have to replace it. Shit! Tonight was pretty much a repeat of last night at work, though I did get home much earlier. I guess that I can look at it this way; that was a couple of hundred dollars that I didn't have this afternoon!

I got home and PS and MCM's cars were here, music playing, and lights on. I thought they were here. I guess that they went out with someone else. I tried to call PS, but if he's out, he probably can't hear his phone anyway. So, I'm assuming that they are out, unless they are hiding in a closet waiting to jump out and scare the ever living hell out of me!!!

As I was getting ready for bed last night; I read some old journal entries that I have in my many journals. I just started crying my eyes out b/c I feel that I'm truly destined to be alone. I just want "someone". I was listening to David Gray which didn't help. That cd brings back some memories of fun times. It's kind of why the Dark Side Of The Moon cd reminds me of Texas. Don't ask me why! It just reminds me of looking at the stars and seeing them like I've never seen them before. It also reminds me of a rock, craziness!!!

My schedule for next week totally sucks. I don't have one day off. I work a double on mon., 10am on tues., 10am on wed., thurs. 11am. (maybe that night, don't know yet), 10am/4:30pm on fri., and 4pm for sat. I'm sooo tired right now that I could probably just rest and do nothing for the next 3 days. No, I have a whole 24 hour off work. I hate that b/c there are things that I want to do (like shop) and visit family, but I'm just so damn tired from my week that I usually just end up staying home and doing nothing. I took an Ambien last night and got a really good night's sleep. I woke up this morning with tons of energy. I left to go and get my medicine and something to eat before work. Maybe I'll wake up the same in the morning! If I do; it'll probably be so fucking cold that I don't want to leave the house. I hate Mississippi weather!!!!!!! It was 70 degrees yesterday and now it's like 20. This sucks!

I will probably try to go to my familie's tomorrow/today/whatever. I need to wash my work clothes and pick up a few things. There is a painting out there that's been in HH's room forever. It's a HUGE 5 x 4 canvas. I'm almost finished with it. The background it a very bright yellow. (it's actually called canary yellow) It is of a huge butterfly that covers the whole canvas, just about. The butterfly is a bright sapphire blue. I want to finish it. It'll probably only take me an hour or so. I also want to finish PS's painting. Hopefully, I'll be motivated and it won't be ever so cold. I was even thinking, the other day, that I wanted to rake our front yard. There are leaves everywhere. Seriously, you can't even see grass. I'm just curious to see if there is any under all of those leaves. When it's much warmer, I'll let ya know. I know that you care oh so much.

I guess that I'm going to finish listening to my cd and get ready for bed b/c my fingers are falling off as I type. TTFN!!!

Scoop the Poop!!! Just one more fucking thing that I have to do today, Urrgh, and take out the garbage. I love my life.
  Where's Mickey? Do I live Here? Where Am I?
I got home from work a few hours ago. We were really slow tonight. I made good money, but it could have been better. Hopefully tomorrow/this evening will be better. It's now 2:28am. I'm tired, but I'm wired and need to chill out a bit before I go to bed. I guess that's why I'm enjoying the pleasure of my 2nd Bud Light!

I had to come and do an entry b/c PS and MCM are watching Halloween and that movie just freaks me the fuck out. I can just look at Michael's mask and have nightmares for the rest of the night. Freddy, Jason, and all of the countless others, I can handle. There's just something about that mask that fucks with me. I dunno, but I'm not participating in the whole movie watching thing. I'm posting. (while hearing the da-da-da-da-da,etc. creepy!)

I was susposed to go over to Pepe's place after work. I tried to call him twice and never got an answer. He lives a few road blocks away from me. I didn't want to drive all the way out there only to find that he's not home. That would have just pissed me off. I guess we'll see eachother one of these days. I don't even want to think about my work schedule next week. I work a double on Monday and I work almost every shift the rest of the week. My only day off is Sunday. I think that is only b/c we're FUCKING closed.

I mean, I'm making damn good money, but I'd give up just one shift for some well needed rest. I'm exhausted right now! After a shitty night at work; we all decided to go and have a beer at Gia's. It was fun. I basically sat there and talked to Nicole about her wedding and how she was going to fling her bouquet right to me. We've got it all planned out. I'm gonna catch that fucker just like a baseball. Guess I should practice! Heee!!!

I guess that I'm fixing to be off to bed. I'm tired and think that I might even take an Ambien to make sure that I sleep like a dream or have nightmares of Michael Myers. Who knows?

Scoop the Poop...
Friday, January 21, 2005
  We're Those People
Good morning, people! It's 9am here. ( I always have to type that b/c the post time is never correct.) I'm up waiting for the gas man to get here and fill up our tank. Don't get me wrong, I didn't want to be up this early. It's just when I'm in my room asleep with the door shut, I can't hear if anyone is knocking or what. So, I'm UP! Damn it!!! I didn't finally fall asleep until about 2am. Last night totally sucked.

PS and Father O' got home at about 1am. Father O' was really, really drunk off of what PS said was only a few drinks. He was all silly acting. I guess that he felt better after throwing up all over the side of his car on the way home. I know I would. Apparantly, they hit every bar in the Metro area. It sounded like a good time. I wouldn't know. I wasn't invited. I was only asked for a 20 dollar loan and heard a quick bye as they flew out the door. I guess that I shouldn't be surprised, I mean, why in the hell would PS want me to go out with them? It's not like we're "friends" or anything.

That was a very sad statement for me to make, but it has become true. 6 months ago, before we moved in together, I would have been told to make myself all purdy and come on. I know that I mentioned this in one of my last entries, but we haven't done anything "friend like" since we've moved in together. Unless, you count going to the grocery store together. It's not like we've gotten to the point of not talking or anything like that, but I'm sure that'll come next. I just don't feel like he cares for me or even wants to be my friend. I just feel like the person that he shares a living space with. It's sad, really, b/c I truly thought that we were best friends. Sometimes, I don't even feel that he's happy with us living together. I dunno!?! I just know that last night; I did everything, but invite myself, and was still left home alone.

I guess these things just happen when friends move in together. I could understand not wanting to hang out b/c we just saw sooo much of each other, but we don't. Hell, who am I to sit here and say that he should hang out with me or try to? I'm just his fucking roommate. He has every right to come and go anywhere he pleases. The whole situation has just made me very emmotional. I feel like I don't have any friends. None! My day with Alice has been cancelled. It's not her fault. Her husband is sick, so she's going to do the good wife thing and stay home with him. As she should! I hope he gets to feeling better soon. It sucks to be sick.

I was writing in my journal last night/this morning when blogger decided to shut down. I was writing that I'm just going to go into my "hermit" mode of life. I started laughing hysterically, I'm already there! The only way that I could become more of a fucking hermit than I am now would be to quit my job and lock myself in my bedroom. That's where I've been spending most of my time anyway.

I don't know if I'm just sitting here feeling sorry for myself or wtf. I do know that I need to get a life of my own. I need someone/something that makes me happy. I'll get started on it at some point. I'm just not feeling like Suzie Sweets and wanting to go out in search of love and friendship. Maybe later. None of my so-called friends ever call me unless they need or want something from me. To you people, it's over! I'm breaking up with you b/c I deserve to be treated better.

Ok, off the depressing bullshit that is my life. I have to work tonight and tomorrow night. Hooray! I think that I'm going to go and visit my family on sunday for a little while. I'm dying to see my Mom's hair. She cut it all off. It's like chin length. That's sooo awesome to me. This woman has not had a different haircut in 30 years. For real. Remember the photo that I put up of us with the Easter bunny? That pic. was taken in 1984 and the last time that I saw her, she had the same haircut. You go, Mom!!! I'm sure that it looks great. She said that she was bathing and looked in the mirror and just got sick of it, said fuck it, and started cutting. It's not like my mother is some crazy woman that started whacking her hair off. She know how to cut, color, and highlight. She's been doing her hair and my sister's forever. I'll let her dye mine, but not cut. I only let gay men cut my hair. Unless I'm totally broke, than, I'll just take a drive to Monroe and let my cousin do it for free.

Speaking of Funroe, I will be making a road trip there at the end of Feb. My brother and cousin and other family have been bugging me to come visit. I guess that I should. I just hate that place. It always leaves me depressed b/c it's not the same place that I spent the first 18 years of my life. It's changed sooo much and it makes me sad. It makes me sad to bump into old friends and not even remember their names. (people that I went to Catholic school with, of course) Everyone went to Catholic school. Not everyone, but you get my point. You live in La. You go to Catholic school. That was just in the handbook of parenting or something. Beats the shit out of me? My Mom did let me go to public school for one year and I must say it was different. Instead of cute little girls in their awful uniforms trying to catch a quick smoke in the bathroom, there was big nasty bitches that looked like they were ready to kick your ass smoking pot in the restroom. Wow! Now that was a big change. I learned that all people aren't like the spoiled little Catholic school kids. Some of them were cool, some of them became my friends, and some of them were just plain old scary!!!

I think that I'm fixing to call my cousin and talk for a while until the gas man gets here and I can leave the house and go get something to eat and some smokes. I've got 3 left. He'd better hurry his ass up!

Scoop the Poop on Sunday!!!
Thursday, January 20, 2005
  Cookie Monster Was Here
I wrote this this morning at 1am. Ok?

I just got up to eat some Famous Amos chocolate chip cookies only to find that the whole freaking box was gone. I was ready to kick his big blue ass. I was pissed b/c I was tasting me some cookies!!! You all know about my middle of the night love for chocolate!?! You should, remember the truffle incident? I'm hungry and have just finished off the last of my SpongeBob SquarePants animal crackers. There is just nothing open around here to get a bite, unless I want to get out in the freezing cold and drive 10 miles and I don't! Hopefully, I'll get a chance to eat later today.

I'm now listening to my T.D.F. cd by Retail Therapy. For those of you that don't know; this is a rainforrest/techno/new age cd by the one and only Eric Clapton. Didn't know that, did ya? He even goes by the name of X-sample. He said that he did that b/c he didn't want people (like me) buying it just b/c it was E.C. A friend of mine got it for me years ago. She/he (don't remember) thought that I'd appreciate it knowing the Clapton freak that I am. (I really do have just about EVERYTHING the man has ever done. Along with my autographed record of the self titled E.C. albumn that hangs in my bedroom) The Retail Therapy is a very relaxing cd. (you'd never guess that it was E.C.) Though, sometimes you can hear a slight rift from his guitar. I love it!!!

I guess that I'm fixing to go and see WTF the dog is barking at and try to go back to sleep!!! See ya later, Cookie Monster!!!

Ok. That's what I wrote in my journal last night/ this morning whatever. It's now about 6:30pm. here. I got home from work at about 3pm and came home and quickly changed clothes and went next door to visit with Alice and use her dryer. I really needed to wash my work pants. I don't think that they've been washed in like 2 weeks and my apron that covers my pants b/c I'm sooo fucking short was nasty. I had butter, comeback dressing, and ketchup stains ALL over it. I don't go in until 4:30pm tomorrow. Yippiee!!! I just wanted to look clean and nice for the weekend.

I can't tell you how happy I am that I don't have to work until 4:30pm tomorrow. I can stay up past 10pm and sleep in. (well, until when Ellen comes on) Alice and I are planning on hanging out and watching soaps ALL DAY! Hooray! Now, that I work mostly all lunches, I don't know what's going on with my peeps. Hell, you can go like a year and watch once and find out everything that you've missed. It's not only "soap day", but it's quality time spent with my only female friend. We can talk girly stuff, bitch about men, etc... Oh, and when I was over at her house earlier, she gave me the most awesome Mickey Mouse clock thingy ever. It's like 10 inches by 5 inches. It has Mickey's all over it through the years with a watch size clock on it. That is the 3rd Mickey related item that she has given to me. We've only been friends for 5 months, but I love her. Anyway, tomorrow, I will also have enough time for an hour nap before I go to work. How wonderful is that?

I'm sitting here now with a Tigger in my lap. of course, and listening to the Bee Gees. I was listening to Dark Side Of The Moon. It just goes by so fast. For some odd reason, I can be depressed as hell and hear one song by the Bee Gees and I've immediately got a smile on my face. Don't ask why, 'cause I sure as hell don't know why The Brothers Gibb makes me so darn happy, but that they do!!!

Father O' Flannigan just got here. I must be going soon b/c they'd probably rather not jam out to the Bee Gees. Sorry, babies!!! Anyhow, I must say something about PS's workout at the gym today. Ok. When he goes into the steam room, he's not there to see your old wrinkley assed dicks. He's there to chill out after a long workout. This is to whom I will call, Mr. Gross Old Man at the Gym, "you're not ever going to see PS's cock as you like to call it. You're an old gross bastard that probably likes to look a child pornagraphy! You need to stay the hell from PS. If not, you're going to force my skinny, lazy ass to go to the gym where I can beat your old ass!!! Got it! It's people like you that abuse children and then are there to remind adults of former abuse. FUCK YOU!"

Scoop the Poop when ever your up for it, not now!!!
Wednesday, January 19, 2005
  All By Myself...
Well, PS got a better offer, so, we did not have dinner. I told you that he was cheating on me. I knew it! I just woke from a little nap. I'm sitting here listening to the Indigo Girls. I love them. I haven't listened to them in years. It's nice.

I'm finding myself falling into my same depression that I was in about a year ago. I went back and read a few old entries. I was getting upset b/c it's been a year and I'm still depressed. I feel like I have no friends. I mean, I have PS, but we never really hang out unless he just happens to be here. I can't tell you how sick I am of just working, shopping, and going home. Day after day, it's the EXACT same thing. I feel as if I'm going through life in robot mode. I just want someone, anyone. I just want a "friend". I want someone to invite me to dinner, lunch, movies, flea market, SOMETHING!!! For the love of God, afterall, I'm the nicest fucking person that I know! People should want to be friends with me, right? Then, where in the hell are they right now at this very moment in time? You tell me!

I seriously go to work and then usually come straight home. I'm usually spending my free time on the computer or sleeping. As a matter of fact, I think that I'll take my sad ass there now.

Scoop the Poop, Fuck It!!!
  Are We Just The Cutest Thangs Evah Or What?
I got home from work about an hour ago. It was FUN, not! I'm just glad that I don't have to be there until 11am tomorrow. Yippiee!!! You know what that means, that means that I get to watch Ellen at 10am. Hooray!!! I love me some Ellen.

I got PS to take the pics. for me b/c you all know that I'm computer retardedo!!! I told you that it was the coolest shirt ever. Now, if I could only find a cool Willie Nelson t-shirt, life would be complete!!! Anyway, I do love this shirt and I'm ever so glad that I decided to treat myself to it. I've earned it Damn It!!!

I think that PS and I are going out to dinner this evening. We're trying to get the "spark" back in our "relationship". I think that he's cheating on me. I'm terrified! All kidding aside, I just thought that it would be nice to have dinner with my best friend/roomie. I don't think that we've been out to dinner or anything similar since we've moved in together. No, we haven't and we've been living together for 5 months now. I think that it's time that he took me on a date. I hope that we have a fantabulous evening. I'm sure we will. We've never had a bad time while out for dinner consuming lots of alcohol. This will be his treat, of course b/c he's the closest thing that I have to a boyfriend at this particular moment in time. Heee!!!

I must add that PS did the most AMAZING painting of the Queen of Hearts from Alice in Wonderland. He was planning on donating it to the Hearts Against Aids event, but NO! Anyway, he got it framed and finished yesterday. Both of us decided that it was his best work evah and he must keep it. I would post a pic, but I'm sure that he'd much rather put it on his blog. He's now throwing something together for them b/c he has to have it there by sat. He's fabulous any can probably shit into artwork. Really, he can! I'm sooo jealous!

Scoop the Poop and go dutch!!!

We both look good in green. It's amazing. I had no idea!!! Posted by Hello

This is the back. I didn't even know that it was on there. Cool, huh? Posted by Hello

This is the front of my coolest shirt ever!!! I love it!!! Posted by Hello
Tuesday, January 18, 2005
  I Don't Look Good In Green
When I got off of work today, I stopped by the mall to get my Gap dream supplies. I got the shower gel. Yeah!!! They haven't had it in forever and I like to layer with the same lotion, spray, and edt. You know! 'Cause I'm girly like that!!! Anyway, I ended up in Victoria's Secret and got a few things and didn't spend more than 25 dollars. Good, huh? I then thought that I would treat myself to this Eric Clapton t-shirt that I've been eyeing for months now. It was only 17 dollars. What a deal! How could I pass that up? It's the coolest shirt in the world, BUT it's green. I mean like a loud bright green. I've never looked good in green, but I had to have it. I got home and put it on to see what it looked like and I must say that this is the ONLY green item of clothing that I do look good in. I'll post a pic. when PS gets home b/c you know I don't know what the hell I'm doing.

I hate to cut it so short, but I'm freezing my ass off and think that I'm fixing to go and snuggle with Miss Tigger under the electric blanket! Burrr!!!

Scoop the Poop!!! It's FUN!!!
Monday, January 17, 2005
  I'm A FH, NO!!!
It's 12:17am. I just got home from work about 30 minutes ago. It is absolutely freezing in this house. It's like 20 outside and God only knows what it is in here. I seriously can't feel my fingers as I type. I had a really good day at work. I shall go shopping A.S.A.P. This will not be a very long post b/c I'm afraid that my fingers will fall off!

I've been thinking about this since last thursday while watching Will and Grace. I'm PS' s "fag-hag". I've sooo always hated that term. It's so cliche/cool/I've got a gay friend Wahoo!/ I'm sooo cool word to me. But, when Will said, "If the hag don't like you, the fag don't date you!" That's so true! I then realized that I was (I think) his Grace. I mean we live together. We share a bathroom and other secrets! It just kind of pissed me off when I came to that realization, but I couldn't ask for a better fag to hag to!!!

I'll be back when I can feel my fingers!!!!!!!

I just had to add that while on my break today I walked down to our local record store (that I worked at 10 years ago) and ordered the Fast Times At Ridgemont High soundtrack! I'm so excited to get it! I mean, I have most of the cd's from the movie, but to have them all in one. Squeee!!! PS had never seen it and watched it for the first time yesterday or the day before or something. It's one of my all time fav-o-rite movies and after watching it, I HAD to have the soundtrack. You understand, don't you?

Scoop the Poop or let it freeze!!!
Sunday, January 16, 2005
  Who Who
This was the whole point of my post last night/this morning. Remember the dead horse? Um, yeah. On my way to work yesterday, what did I see dead on the side of the road? A fucking OWL! Please explain to me, how in the hell do you manage to hit a fucking owl with your automobile? I dunno, but it upset me to see the poor thing just laying there. It was white with light brown feathers and still looked ever so beautiful. I guess thats what I get for living in the country!!!

Scoop the Poop, I'm fixing to!!!
Saturday, January 15, 2005
  No More Jets, I Want To Cry
Ok, about my jets. They played the Steelers today, well, yesterday. It's 12:02 am. I just got home from work. Anyway. The game was tied 17-17. Our kicker had a chance to kick a field goal and win, BUT it hit the post and didn't count. Then in overtime, the little bastard had the same chance. One field goal and you win, you could go to the Super Bowl! WTF does he do? He does the same FUCKING thing. Needless to say, they lost and I'm pissed. I hope that all of the Jets ganged up on him and kicked hiss ass. Obviously, he wouldn't be able to kick back b/c he SUCKS!!! Ok, enough of that. I'm getting worked up and I need to unwind.

Work was alright tonight. I made good money. I made a lot more than I thought I did. That's always a good thing. I love my job!

HH wants to meet up tomorrow and watch her Colts play the Patriots. We usually go to this sports bar where everyone in there calls me Jets girl. Ha! Ha! HH is a HUGE Colts fan. I would like to go just b/c I hate, hate, hate the Patriots and would love to see the Colts kick their ass, but it's sooo freaking cold here that I just don't want to leave the house. I think the high for today/tomorrow is 40 degrees or something. I would much rather just lay on the couch and watch the game here. I would ask HH if she wanted to watch it here, but she likes to go and drink daiquiris and play Ms. Pac-Man. It's really not about the football at all. Maybe I'll feel better after a good night of rest and watch the game with her. BUT, I'm still not sure.

I'm just not sleepy right now. I'm just sitting here listening to Dark Side Of The Moon. It's a good cd to mellow out to. You know how when you leave work, you're like, "I'm sooo tired, I'm going home and going straight to bed!!" then you get home and your wired? That's basically how I feel right now.

I work my ass off next week. I work a double mon. I work every lunch. I work a double fri. and I work sat. night. I'm going to be so fucking tired this time next week. The money will be good, guess I can't complain. Thank God that we're closed on sundays!!!

I guess that I must be going for there is a Tigger in my lap (making it hard to type) demanding attention. (imagine that) I guess that I'm going to see whats on the tele. or watch a movie or write in journal or read or just go to sleep. Who Knows?

Scoop the Poop, tomorrow/today, I promise!!!

  Don't Say A Prayer For Me Now
I am thinking of sad you and hoping that you soon will rise up from the mud like some new species, improved by the forces of natural selection and ready to out survive and outbreed us humans. You will retain the essence of your former self, the inner strength, free spirit, and smooth skin, yet you will also be newly formed in ways, I, as a human, can only imagine. That is my prayer for you tonight. Life is too short for this moping that you're doing.

An old friend wrote that to me On Jan. 8th last year. I'm just waiting for it to happen! He does have a good way with words. Sometimes they can make me happy and sometimes, they can piss me off!!! I did think it was sweet of him to take the time to write it for me.

It's 7:15am here. I've been up since 6am. Don't ask me why! I went to bed at 10 or 11ish. I woke up at 1am and then went back to sleep. I was awake again by 3am and finally was able to go back to sleep at around 4am only to wake up at fucking 6am on the one day that I can sleep until 3pm if wanted! WTF??? When I woke up at 6am, I felt like i'd swallowed an alien baby or something an it was trying to get out on way or another.

I guess that I should not have taken that box of Famous Amos Chocolate cookies to bed with me to bed. It's really pathetic what I have beside my bed. I have Famous Amos, not one, but two boxes of Cheez-It's, one half full bag of SpongeBob animal crackers, and one empty. I've turned into a little junk food junkie in the past week. Oh well, I may go grab something totally not good for me for breakfast. Since I'm UP!!! I don't know, it's pretty fucking cold outside. Maybe, I'll just have a V-8 and try to go back to sleep. For now, I am just typing random bullshit. Go Jets!!! See.

Scoop the Poop, Go Jets!!! See. Again!
Friday, January 14, 2005
  A Crazy Day
Alice came over this morning to clean and did a fantabulous job. This house is so clean that you could eat off the floor. The girl got out toilet WHITE. I didn't even know that it could be anything, but orange. She's a sweetheart and I luv her. I'm glad to have finally found a "girlfriend" b/c I have none!

Anyway, I left at about 10:15 to get the long over due french manicure. I know in the past I've written about seeing different dead animals on the road, but today topped them all and really upset me. I was on my way and saw what looked like a big pile of dirt in the middle of the road. I moved over and glanced to see what it was. OH MY GOD!!! It was a dead horse that had been hit by a car and you could still see it's poor head. I have a horse, well, my family has many, but it just upset the hell out of me. Now, has The Godfather been here or what? No, we just have a bunch of dumb asses that ride their horses down busy roads like dumb fucks. I hate these people, First of all, a horse riding on concrete or whatever is very bad on their feet. It just pisses me off every time I see them. Now, after seeing Mr/Ms dead horse, I hate them more.

Enough of that. I got my nails done and they look sooo purdy! I had a chance to talk to Ms. Barbara and it was fun. I got home and got hooked on the soap crack. I work all lunches, so I never get to see them. I watched until about 2:30pm and went to take a nap before I had to be at work at 4:30pm.

Here's where the fun starts, I don't remember much but I had a seizure this afternoon. This one was definitely the worst one that I've had since the "big one". Alice called my work for me and told them. They said for me just to give them a call when I was feeling better to let them know that I was ok. Because, yesterday at lunch, I had a small seizure. I just remember the owner telling me to go and sit at the bar. He got me a Coke and just sat there and talked to me and some how didn't let me go haywire. They used to have a girl there with my condition, so they pretty much know what to look for and what to do. How in the world did I ever get blessed with such a wonderful job with the greatest bosses in the world? I dunno either! I am upset not to be at work tonight b/c that is basically missing out on 1-2 hundred dollars. Oh well, I obviously need to rest up for tomorrow. Hopefully tomorrow night I'll make good money. Hope so!!!

*Just a little note to Perpetual Blonde, if you're reading, I can totally understand why you didn't want to leave the house yesterday, but Damn, that was a beautiful photo!!!*

Scoop the Poop, I'm fixing to. Get off my ass!!!
Wednesday, January 12, 2005
  Did You Love Me? Do You Still Love Me?
Did you love me?

Did you love me after our first kiss?

Did you love me the first time that we made love?

Did you love me when no one else did?

Did you ever love me?

If you did, than why did you leave me?

Do you ever think of where we'd be if we never left eachother?

I do, I miss you every day.

I imagine where we'd be in our relationship now.

I miss you even when I see you.

Did you really love me?

You said that you did and I believed you.

Did you truly love me?

Is that why you left?

I miss "us".

Scoop the Poop, for the love of God!!!
Tuesday, January 11, 2005
  Deep In The Heart Of Texas
Hello everyone! How's it going? All good on my end.(believe it or not) Miss Tigger is healing wonderfully. Hooray!!! I've just been busting my ass all week and it's only tuesday! Arrrgh!!! I work lunch tomorrow and thursday. I work friday and saturday night. Money, money, money!!! Yeah!

I do have an apt. to get a long over due french manicure friday before work. My nails look like shit. They and my hair grow REALLY fast. I can cut my nails off and 2 weeks later they are like an inch long. Crazy, huh? I could do it myself, but I'd just rather pay someone else to do it for me. The lady that I go to, I've been going to her for years and haven't seen her in like 2 years. My getting my nails done will give us a chance to play "catch up". I was actually at her salon on Sept. 11th. I had just left school (college, not high) and was listening on the radio about the planes, but they didn't know what was going on. I got to her salon, just as the first plane hit. We just sat there glued to the tele. and cried our eyes out all while getting my little french manicure. I'll never forget that day as long as I live. I think that Ms. Barbara was one of the first people to run outside and put up her American flag. It was touching. Guess you had to be there. I also used to work in the hospital that her late husband was always in. I used to make his IV's. Weird, huh?

I'm just getting home from a very long day. I went to work and then went over to Pepe's to watch this Dark Side Of The Moon dvd. It was pretty cool. I then left and went by Walgreen's to pick up a few things. I had to get a card for Mama at work. She's sick and hasn't been there since New Year's. I don't know if I've ever told you about Mama. She's the owner's mother. She doesn't speak a word of english or understand it, but somehow, we can communicate just like we're talking. She reminds me of the South American version of Sophia (Estelle Getty) form the Golden Girls. She's sooo cute and I like having someone there that is small like me, but packed full of dy-no-mite!!!

PS and I are seriously talking about moving to Austin this summer. I think that it would be a good thing for both of us. First, I love Austin. I'm sure that we'd have no problem finding jobs and a place to live. I just want a cool apt. or house. Whatever!!! I know that PS is planning on going back to school. I also am, but really need to check into the colleges around there and see what's best for me. I want to finish nursing, but I would love to be a journalist. I would love to get paid to write. How awesome is that? I could be the Carrie Bradshaw of Austin. I'm sure they already have one though. I think that we should plan a trip there sometimes soon and just check it out. Besides, it would be a fun road trip.

Ok. Now I must be leaving b/c there is gossip arout the Brad and Jennifer split on the tele. I can't resist. It's like a train wreck. Besides, the last episode of the Biggest Looser is coming on next. It's the only reality show that I've really gotten into and have seen all of them. I hate that I didn't see Lost from the beginning. (I know it's not reality. 'kay!) It just seems like an awesome freaking show and I don't want to start watching something that I have no clue what's going on. I'll only watch shows that I've seen from the VERY beginnig. Call me anal. I just want to know what's going on. Ok, gotta go. I'll be back later. I have a poem that I wrote in my head last night and am now going to attempt to put on paper where I can share it with you. I also have a few questions and answers about what happened last year and what I want to be different this year. On that very long note, see ya!

Scoop the Poop, 'cause that shit stinks!!!
Sunday, January 09, 2005
  Someone's Getting A Spanking
PS made it home and we did the whole domestic thing by going to the grocery together. We're such a cute fucking couple. I swear, if he was not gay, I'd date him just for a pretty accessory. Anyhew, PS did something REALLY bad while he was in the Memphis hole. If you want to know about it, go and listen to his latest talking blog entry. I'm very upset by what he did, but, I'm not his Mom when he's in Memphis, BUT, I am his Mom in Jackson. I think that I'll be nice and let him go and pick out his own switch for me to give him a few licks!!!

I'm just happy that he made it home ok and is feeling better, but I'm still going to kick his ass. I'll wait until Desperate Housewives is over and just attack out of nowhere. That way, he won't be expecting to get an ass kicking.

I don't have to drive to Memphis and kick Brazilian balls b/c Joey did call and attempt to see PS. Unfortunately, they didn't see eachother, but I told PS that by not seeing him will only make him want to see him sooo much more next time. You know how guys are (even the gay ones) once they think that they can have you and that you're totally into them, they blow you off. If you blow them off, for some ungodly reason, they only want you more. So, you go, PS!!!

Ok, Our show is fixing to start. I'm sure that I'll be back later!!!

Scoop the Poop later!!!
  Left Running You Said You Were Flying, Left Running You Said You Were Cold
Ok. I'm just now getting a chance to update. I'm sitting here listening to one of my fav-o-rite cd's: America by The Jayhawks. My fav. song is Blue. It's oh so pretty.(all while being licked all over by Miss Tigger) Oh well, I've worked my ass off ALL weekend. I got off from work last night around midnight and got to go and do laundry. FUN!!! I can't complain b/c I made me some cash last night. Hooray!!! I also got to sit at the bar and roll silverware while watching my Jets win against the Chargers. Do I have a wonderful job or what? Go Jets, go!!!

The news on my little Miss Tigger is that the tumor was benign and she's FINE. Now, that deserves a big ole YIPPIEE!!! I called Dr. Vet's office friday from work and the technician said for me to call back in the morning b/c he was in surgery and he wanted to speak with me in person. OH MY GOD! I thought that he just wanted to tell me himself that she had cancer, but no, no, no, he just wanted to explain everything to me. He basically said that he'd gotten it all and all is well. I asked him if she needed to come in for an x-ray or anything to make sure that he definitely got it all. He said that there is no reason for him to see her until next year for her shots. I'm sooo fucking happy, people, you just don't know. Dr. Vet said that if I'd waited just another month, she'd probably have died. God and everyone else out there, thank you for your prayers and good vibes b/c they worked. I seriously don't know what I'd do without the baby that's warming my lap as I type. I love her like she's my child or something. Call me crazy! I know I'm crazy, it's you so called "normal" fuckers that scare me.

Anyway, I just took ALL of the garbage out. That was extra fun! PS is in Memphis, of course. I'm hoping that he'll be home in time to watch Desperate Housewives with me. That's our usual sunday night thing, if he's here. I hope that he had a fun old time in gay ole Memphis! Joey had better have called his ass or I'm going to have to drive my little Miata up there and kick his Brazilian balls!!! (You don't be fucking around with my baby's head, GOT IT!!!) I mean, he's totally hot and all, but that gives him no right to fuck with people's (especially PS's) emotions.

It's like 50 degrees here and the high was susposed to be 70. I'm cold! We live in an old house. This house was probably built 200 years ago or something. It's your typical old southern home with a front porch (with swing) and a back porch. The only thing that we don't like is that this house runs on gas as far as heat and the ONLY heater is in the bathroom. I swear, I could open the door right now and it would be warmer outside than it is in here. I've also got like 2 or 3 heaters plugged in. I'm fixing to go outside and see how it feels. (hold on, ok, b/c we're really on the phone) Yeah, it's 70 outside and like 30 in here. I think that I'm fixing to put Miss Tigger in the bedroom on the electric blanket and I'm going to go sit on the porch swing and plan my day.

Oh, what fun, I need to go to the grocery store and um, that's pretty much it. I want to go to the flea market, but I hate going there by myself b/c I always bump into people that I really don't want to see. I also tend to buy a bunch of shit that I have no room for. I've come to the conclusion that when I get my walls painted and my bedroom looking more like a bedroom than "the hey man, you listen to some old music, got any weed? room" (I've got old cool pictures of Janis Joplin, Willie Nelson, and lots of Eric Clapton on the walls for now.) that I'm going to have my dad come and build me some shelves every place that one can be built 'cause I got a lot of shit that I ain't goona part with. Sorry! Call me a pack rat. I don't care. I've just got LOTS of pictures and love cute frames. I've got photos of my sister (HH) and myself in cute frames from babies to like 5 years all the way from graduation to now. We're only a year and 1/2 apart, so we've always been close. I've got pictures in cute frame of everyone from Pepe, PS, family, and I can't tell you how may kitty frames that hold photos of Tigger. I'll always take more. (If you're reading this and just feel the sudden urge to go and buy me a cute little kitty frame, just email me and I'll send you my address. Ha! Ha!) It really is funny though b/c I think that I have more pictures of my cat than I do of anyone that I know.

On, that note, I think that I'm going outside b/c it's freaking cold in here. I need cute little gloves. I may attempt to go to Old Navy and grab some, but I doubt that I do. I'll just be cold. Oh, but what if they have hot pink? Decissions, decissions!

Scoop the Poop, either today or tomorrow, but it would be better to do it today, ARRRGH!!!
Wednesday, January 05, 2005
  Some Old Shit
Thursday, January 08, 2004
Your A Very Bad Girl, NN, Kinda Pathetic TooJust a little note here to let myself know how very disappointed that I am in, well, myself. I am officially smoking again! I have been smoking since Saturday. I did not smoke Sunday. I thought that I wasn't smoking because I did not want or need to. I was wrong. I was not smoking because I was hung over and afraid that a cigarette would only make me vomit or worse. (There are lots of things that make me want to vomit. All of which I will share with you on another day.) Anyway, Sunday night I started to feel better so I began to smoke again. (I was watching CM smoke and it looked sooo satisfying that I had to have one.) That one cigarette quickly turned into one pack which has turned into two packs, well you get the picture. I do not plan on smoking daily again. I WILL QUIT!! I have the flu and for some strange reason, a cigarette makes me feel like I can hack up most of that shit that has built up in my chest and yes, it IS helping. Don't judge me, damn it! I must also point out to myself how absolutely pathetic that I was when my computer was broken. I lied in the bed and stared at it like it were a sick relative. (The sad part is that I am happier on this freaking computer than I am with most people these days.) Sad, NN, very, very sad! It is giving me something to do with my time rather than sit around feeling sorry for myself because life simply doesn't go my way. You know what, it never has. Why should I be so damn upset about it now? Really, things have never been too terribly easy for me. I have never really been too happy with anyone. (Friends, lovers, anyone) I think that I simply put up with my totally disfunctional family because, well, because they ARE my family. I just keep thinking that one fine day I will indeed be happy. I guess that it is hard to believe it when in all of my nearly 28 years on this planet (Yes, I'm orginally from Mars.) I've never been really happy. I've just been really sad. I try so f***ing hard to gain everyone's love and approval that I think I make it extra hard on myself. Oh well, if it never happens, I will live. I've been doing it a long time. Why should I stop now? ΒΆ 2:20 PM

I wrote that right at a year ago. It's funny b/c most of it still stands true. Funny, huh?

Scoop the Poop!!! Again!
  Love Of Mine
I wrote this at 10:15pm while listening to Mr. Willie Nelson. It's probably no good, but it just came out of me as we were sitting in the bedroom. It's my poem/whatever to Tigger. Here goes:

You are the most honest and loving creature that I've ever had the pleasure of knowing. So much more of a pleasure to be able to call you mine. You know me inside and out. You've made many, many moves with me. You've been there for the good, the bad, and sometimes the VERY ugly. You never left me. You never judged me. You only understood how my "crazy" mind was working at that particular moment in time. You've been there for me no matter what. (though I guess that you really don't have a choice, now that I think about it!)
We've grown up together. I mean, I was 17 years and you were a baby when we met. I'll be 29 in march. This is probably one of the longest and most connected friendships that I've ever had. Yet, you've never said one single word to me. (except "MEOW!")
To my most loving Tigger, may you be well soon and always know how very much that I love you. May you forever be my most beautiful friend. May you be the Love of Mine, always!

* You people may think that I'm nuts, but I really don't care. Tigger is the closest thing that I've had to a child (which I want) and I'm going through "baby fever" big time. It also doesn't look like I'll be pregnant any time soon! GOT IT!*

Scoop the Poop!!! I FINALLY took a shower. I smell good, hell, I always smell good!
  Do You Have Any Information About The Foreign Object That You Removed From My Pussy?
Yes, I did it! I called the vet. (yesterday and today) I called yesterday b/c she hadn't started eating yet. Dr. Vet said that the medicine probably had not yet fully worn off. I just called today to see if (maybe) they might have heard something from the lab. "No, Miss NN, we'll call you as soon as we hear anything!" I promise to not call them tomorrow, unless I haven't heard from them by 3pm when I have to leave for work! I know and I don't care, I'm that "crazy lady that treats her pet like it's a fucking human! Yes, that's me and I just don't give a big old fuckity fuck-fuck!"

I'm just tired and bithchy. My sleep has basically been like an hour or two here and there. Basically when Miss Tigger wants to snuggle. Then we just end up falling into a sweet and peaceful sleep until...the phone rings and rings and rings. Yep! Don't get me wrong, I'm not upset with anyone calling me. I'm just upset that I keep falling into this wonderful DEEP sleep and as soon as I get there, something wakes me up. I'll start thinking about the test results and the what if's. Earlier we were laying there still listening to Sarah and a few songs played and I just held her so tight and started crying my eyes out. C'mon, test results, be FINE!!!

Tigger did start to eat a little last night. I heard her crunching in her bowl. This morning, I walked over to her bowl with her with the hopes that she'd eat. She just looked at her food, turned her head, flipped me "the tail", and walked off. THEN, I got a little handful and called her to me. She ate them all. She just preferred to have them hand fed to her. (kinda like the fat man and the grapes!) Since then, she's been eating fairly well on her own. I now wish that she'd start to drink a little water. From what I can tell, she hasn't drank much since I put it out for her. I'm just praying that Dr. Vet calls me first thing in the morning with Good News. Then and maybe then, I can close my eyes and get some well deserved non-stressfull rest before I have to go to work. This waiting is driving me looney.

Tigger and I were snuggling earlier (just like we always have) with me laying on my left side and her sleeping on her's with her little head on the pillow and with the covers pulled up on us. It was so cute *beware the following may make the weak vomit* earlier I woke up and I was sleeping with my right arm around Tigger and she had her arm around her baby kitty. Is that not the cutest mental picture ever or what, people?

MCM came by earlier. Actually, he's here right now. They are in PS's room abusing small children or what could have been a bag full og midgets. I dunno! I do know that MCM bought me a mocha cappucinno and a Coke. For that, I am forever in his debt. I'm ever so tired and needed a little pick me up. That's the first cup of coffee that I've had in a while. Oh well, after seeing that there is ABSOLUTELY NOTHING on tv and feeling nauseated after watching all of 10 minutes of the Sports Illustrated Modeling thingy, I had no choice, but to post. Tigger is laying here in my lap. Her stitches look good. She seems to be doing well with her right side. I know she has to be sore.Well, now she has hopped down and is demanding my full attention. Peace, love, and cat-nip!!!

Scoop the Poop and have FUN while doing it!!! Sing a song or something!
Tuesday, January 04, 2005
  Strike A Pose!!!

Posted by Hello

This is a photo that PS just took of myself and Miss Tigger. She's still feeling a little dopey. (While Mama just looks a little dopey. He! He!) She has yet to eat. I called Dr. Vet and he said that she should be eating by tonight. If she's not eating by tonight, they'll befinitely be getting "the crazy cat owner call". Fuck it! That's what they get paid for, correct? Thought so!!!

I went to Dr. MM's looking just like this. Am I pathetic or what. I haven't wanted to leave the cat to even shower which I'm needing b/c I'm starting to smell myself. Alice came over and sat with Miss Tigger until I got home. I thought that was very sweet of her. It is a beautiful 70 degree day in this month of January. (I live in MS. and tomorrow the high could be 30 degrees and the next day it'll be 70. That's exactly why my sinuses STAY fucked up!)

Anyhew, my doctor told me to leave and try to take my mind off of "it". I took one of my anti-anxiety pills, put the top down, put my cd on the Bee Gees, (me, listening to the Bee Gees, crazy?) and went and picked up more medicine and came home to my baby. She's now in the bedroom sleeping and listening to Sarah McLachlan.

Scoop the Poop and try to get some sleep b/c you NEED it and deserve it!!!
  A Nervous Mother Indeed
When we got home from Dr.Vet yesterday, I put Miss Tigger in the bedroom like I was told. I put on Pink Floyd for her and after hours of Dark Side of the Moon; we switched over to Sarah McLachlan. She just laid on her little blanky and barely moved. When she did try to walk, she would just fall down b/c she was sooo doped up. After going in and checking on her evry 5 minutes, I just decided to make myself a little spot next to her (on the hard wooden floor) where I could lay next to her. We laid there for hours. Finally at about 3am, she fell asleep. Iguess it just took that long for the drugs to wear off. It was so cute when she fell asleep. She has this toy and it's a small kitten. When she fell asleep, she put her little paws around him like he was her fucking teddy or something. (it's times like that that I wish I knew how to work our computer's camera, oh well.) I just slept down there with her. We've been up off and on since, but now are REALLY awake. She's getting back to her old self by opening cabinets and doors that are NOT to be opened. She even jumped up on top of the loveseat in the bedroom where she could look out of the window. I checked her little bo-bo and it looked good. No unnecessary bleeding or anything like that was going on. Hooray! My only concern is that she has yet to eat, drink, or use the restroom. I'm sure that I'll be here watching her like a hawk all day today.

I do have a doctor's apt. today at 11:30am, but I don't want to go. If he weren't like 5 miles away, I think that I'd have to reschedule. I just don't want to leave her. Call me the crazy overbearing cooky cat owner! I so don't give a shit!!! That will be the only thing getting me out of the house today!

I swear people, my head hurts so bad today from crying like an emmy winning soap opera actress ALL day long yesterday. I think I need a bc powder. Agrh!!! I haven't cried like that in a LONG time. I don't think that I've cried like that since my Grandmother died. Damn, that was years ago. I'm so tired, but can only sleep for an hour and then I wake up. This has gotten me so stressed out that my stomach is all fucked up and I want to vomit when I eat. I know that I'm going to feel this way until we get those test results. God, please be good news. I've been a good girl. Please don't make my kitty suffer.

Well Alice is over to help me get a better look at her stitches. Everything looks good. Hip-Hip-Hooray!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Got to get ready for the doctor. Later, I'm sure.

Scoop the Poop if you love them!!!
Monday, January 03, 2005
  The Worst Day EVER!!!
Allright, I took Miss Tigger to the vet to get her shots. I showed Dr.Vet her knot thingy. He was rubbing it and said that "it" just didn't feel right. I asked him if he thought that "it" should be removed. He said, "Yes!" So, they gave my baby a shot to make her loopy and put the little gas mask on her head. I stayed in there the whole time. I just pet her and talked to her telling her that Mommie was here and everything was going to be a. ok! I watched as Dr. Vet did the little surgery. The knot was sooo much bigger than "it" felt. He determined that "it" was a tumor and cut off everything that it had spread to. I sat there and cried like my Mother had just died or something!?! He's sending "it" off to the lab tomorrow and I should find out thurs. or fri. if it is maligant or beign (spelling on that, I dunno, don't care, you get it). I'm sure that I won't get a wink of sleep until I get those test results. God forbid, that "it" does turn out to be maligant, Miss Tigger will start chemo next week. Needless to say, NN has had her fair share of anti-anxiety medicine today and am still fucking stressed to the max!!! Like, totally!!! (Why have I always talked like a fucking valley girl with the voice of a chipmunk? I dunno either!)

Dr. Vet told me that the medicine that they gave her would probably make her hallucinate. SO, he told me to put her in her room with the lights out and play calming music for her. I've put on her fav-o-rite cd, Pink Floyd's , Darkside of the Moon. So far, so good. She's just laying on her blanky with her baby and being a good little girl. While really, in her mind, she's probably laying there tripping her ass off to some Pink Floyd. Anyhew, she's doing fine for now. I know that I will be up ALL night with her. So, I'll probably be posting again later!

PS and I are going to give the new show Medium a chance at 9pm. I hope that it doesn't suck gopher's balls, but if it does, it's not like I'm going to slit my wrists or anything! We are also going to watch The Mandarin Orange Candidate. It's supposed to be REALLY good. Well, we'll just see about that and let you know. You do know that the movie Darkness sucks old lady poondada? If not, go to lactating powder and read PS's entry entitled "If Madonna Made A Hooror Movies". I's a gotta go and check on my baby! Later...

Scoop the Poop, right now, I say FUCK it!!!
  Just Breathe
I'm so fucking stressed out right now. I have to take Miss Tigger to the vet in about an hour. I just pray that everything goes ok. I have a feeling in my stomach like I may vomit before we go. I know that I'm definitely more nervous than she is. For she does not know where she's fixing to go. Oh God, the anxiety, make it go away. Ok! Obviously I am in no condition to post at the moment. I'm fixing to go and brush my teeth again and pace around the house for the next 30 minutes until we have to leave. I'll be back to let you know the results!

Scoop the Poop and don't spill it!!!
Sunday, January 02, 2005
  Good Morning Mr. Sunshine
Eliza woke me up at about 6am with those DAMN stiletto's. I gave her a few Ibuprofen to, hopefully, make the BITCH stop it!!! Of course, I'm sitting here listening to the Bee Gees. Who'd thought? PS just got home a little while ago. He is sitting here beside me being tortured by the Bee Gees. Sorry, babe.

He went to Memphis for New Year's and was just telling me about his trip. It sounded fun and funny!!! If you're interested, than go listen to him. You know where to find him. If for some reason, you don't, than go to my links and link on lactating powder. Got It? I would link, but I've linked him before. You should already know where to go and I just don't feel up to fucking linking right now. I'm in a bitchy mood. You would be too if some drunk bitch woke you up only after sleeping for like 3 hours! Sorry, I'm experincing bitchyness at the moment even while listening to The Brother's Gibb. Who'd thought?

MCM came over for a few hours last night to get the full Bee Gees torture/education of. We had a good time. He's a sweetie. I then sat here and watched some old SNL. That was grrreat! I went to bed at about 3 or 4am. Not quite sure. I just know that I tired as fucking fuckity, fuck-fuck!!! There, have I said it enough? Now, today, to be awakened by the bitch from hell, here I am. For there is no other place to go. I'm still not sure if I'm going to make it to church or to watch the game. My stomach hurts very much so at this particular moment in time.

I do have to go over to Pepe's at some point today. I'm going to do a little laundry and hang out for a little while. I don't want him to think that I'm using him for his dryer. I'm just using him for sex! He's also a pretty cool cat to hang out with these days. He knows me better than anyone else in the world. Sometimes it's good to talk to someone that knows you so intimately.

You know how people say that when you loose an eyelash that you should put it between your thumb and your forefinger and make a wish. Then if it sticks to one of them (not sure which) your wish will come true. Ok. Here's my question: what happens if when you open your fingers to find that the lash is gone? Are you screwed? Does your wish automatically come true? I dunno, but I've yet to see world peace or see Ed McMahan come a knocking at my door. I guess that it means that I suck and have no wishes. Oh well! I think that I shall go now. I feel like watching a chick-flick (preferably one with Hugh, though some Steel Magnolias would be really good right now. Hmmm!). I'm sure that we'll see eachother again today. I doubt I get much sleep. I'm nervous as shit about Miss Tigger's Dr.'s apt. tomorrow. (Deep breath) Allright, later!!!

Scoop the Poop b/c they need it and deserve it!!!

Saturday, January 01, 2005
  Lonely Days
Call me an entry whore today. I just don't know what's gotten into me! I guess that I'm just trying to keep my mind off of Eliza. The stiletos are starting to hurt. I did get out an run my really cool errands earlier. I just happened to notice that Pier 1 was open and was like, "oh, I've got to go get my Ginger Peach room spray!" (though, i work 20 feet from them, i HAD to go.) They didn't have my spray, BUT, they had this cute little hot pink heart shaped box with flowers on top. Eeee!!! It totally matches the square one that I got there years ago. Then, they had the cutest little red glass heart shaped candle holders that you'd put a tea light in for $2.50. Uh, yeah, got it! I ended up going in to get something that they were out of and spent 25 dollars. I ended up buying my ginger peach in the incense sticks. I didn't want to blow all of my cash on the candles. I usually get the tea lights only to find that some of them don't even have wicks or the votive's, but they tend to burn fast. I was just trying not to waste money. Um! Um! Pink box!

I then went to the grocery. I spent 10 dollars on my medicine and like 60 on groceries. That's not too bad. I got enough food and cokes to last me while I'm off. I basically got some cookies for Eliza and some frozen veggies for myself. I tried to buy her a bottle of wine, but all of the liquor stores were freaking closed. The nerve of those bastards! What about the people that need alcohol on the 1st? Man, Fuck You, Mr. Liquor store owners!!! (except Trell's dad)

I then got home and proceeded to clean. I swept, changed the litter box, unpacked groceries, and took out the garbage. I know, I rock!!! Speaking of rock, guess what I'm listening to? Ha! Ha! Yeah, I'm still listening to my Bee Gees. Yes, I did take it with me whenI left earlier! I'm sure that I'll be burnt out on them in a few days or a week or two!?@!

I think that I'm fixing to go outside and smoke on the swing and enjoy this wonderful weather. It's been sooo cold and today the high was like 69. "She said 69!" "Shut up, Beavis!" Anyway, now I think that it's like 60 or something like that. So, I will go sit outside and enjoy the fresh air by smoking cigarettes. Yeah, makes sense to me!

I'm really not sure if I'm going to watch my Jets play St. Louis at noon tomorrow or not. They pissed me off last week and HH is in New York or someplace like that. I don't know where in the hell they are. All I know is that my Mom and sister are someplace far, far away. Don't stress me out by asking for details! M'kay? Anyhew, If Eliza takes her shoes off between now and in the morning than I'm going to get up and go to mass at 10 or 10:30 or something like that and then; I might, might, might stop in and just take a peek at the game. I dunno! Allrighty then, MCM is suspose to be coming over. I'm sorry to tell the little sweetie, but if he don't like the Bee Gees, he's up shit creek!!! TTFN!

Scoop the Poop, Done!!!
  Oh, Eliza, Happy New Year
Good Morning! I've been up since like 9am. Yep, go to bed at 3am and wake up at 9am when you could sleep for the next 24hrs. Argh! Why can't I feel like this when I have to get up and go to work? Oh well, screw it!

I just finished the Bee Gees dvd. I saw them all playing together (with Maurice) and just started crying like a baby. I was thinking to myself, "yeah, nn, you do LOVE them, but it wasn't like he was your dad or anything!" I then thought that it was sad that I would never get to see one of my all time favorite bands in concert.(Um! Um! Police! Andy, Stewart, Sting, I know your reading. Think about it. I'd really appreciate it!)

THEN, it hit me! I forgot to mention it in the last post, but just around the stroke of midnight at work, Eliza came to visit me. I just luv her visits. The bitch doesn't call you or anything. She just shows up at your house once a month (sometimes unexpectedly). She eats all of your food. Her favorite is chocolate and Mc Donald's. She drinks all of your liquor. When she has nothing else, she just gives you such a headache that makes you want to cry. Eliza does all of these things all while kicking you in the stomach with her stiletos! (not sure if I spelled that right or not) The bitch stays anywhere from 3 days to a fucking week and then just leaves. She doesn't say good-bye, thanks, kiss my ass, nothing! I hate her, but I've known her for so many years now that I've just kind of gotten used to her drunk ass!

Guess what I'm listening to! Go ahead, guess! Hee! Hee! What was that? Did you guess the Bee Gees? You are sooo fucking right!!! Jive Talkin' just started. I LOVE this cd. I'm going to be listening to them for the next week. I can just "feel" it, you know!?!

I've got to get out in a little while and run a few errands. I get to go to the grocery store and pick up my medicine. Wow, what a fabulous, fucking, f-u-n day you have planned,nn, you suck! I know and I really don't give a shit! Eliza is here and I need to go and get her food and alcohol. She drank all of my beer and it now bitching that; she'd love a glass of wine. (more like a bottle) Anyway, when I do get my lazy ass up and leave, this cd is going with me b/c it's making me happier than a big fat dove in an open bag of birdseed!

Scoop the Poop, no! Get Eliza to do it. The bitch could do something for you letting her visit!!!
  Bee Gees Make Me Happy
It's 2:40am. I got home from work about an hour ago. I freaking got there at 10am. and am absolutely EXHAUSTED!!! The "BIG" 800-1000 day was more like a 300 dollar day, but I ain't complaining. Hell, that's 300 dollars that I didn't have this morning! We weren't as busy as we'd expected, but we were busy. If that makes any sense at all. We just had sooo many tables that would come in and get drunk and be finished with EVERYTHING and just sit there and shoot the shit and I was like, " get the fuck out, you making me loose money, you drunk fucks!" (guess I was jealous that I wasn't a drunk fuck) Anyway, I got home and checked the mail and guess what was in there! Guess! It was my Bee Gees present from Pepe! Hooray!!! I ran inside and ripped it open. I'm now listening to Too Much Heaven. I love them. They make me happy.

The cd is like an hour and a half long. When I'm finished, I'm going to watch the dvd. It has 5 never heard before songs. Heee!!! I'm getting chills just thinking about it. Oh, hell yeah, now the cd's playing Tragedy! Is this a pathetic way to have spent New Year's or what? It could be, but, to me, it's just another day with a new number. It was 4, now it's 5. Crazy, man, it's 2005!

I just saw myself being married with 2 kids by now and I'll be 29 in March. Fuck, I'm almost 30!!! Allright, people, on that note, I'm off to watch some Bee Gees and sleep until I wake up.Hope everyone had a fun evening!!!

Scoop the Poop, Tomorrow, for sure!!!
Just go ahead and read, afterall, did no one tell you that I'm the nicest fucking person that I know?! You can email me at catsinthetub@hotmail.com, go ahead, make my day!

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a damn thing
air america radio
defective yeti
hate your daddy
lactating powder(my best friend)
perpetual blonde
rock snobs
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