Rest in Peace
Ms. Tigger and I on the happiest day...
The Hell We Go Through
I just wanted to do a small entry. I've been working my ass off all week. I have the funniest entry that I wanted to do last night, but by the time I got home, I was too tired to see my Precious. In the next week, it will be my mother and my sister's birthday (both on Monday), I'll be working, and moving out. It may be a week (hopefully not) before I post again. Once I'm unpacked and settled then I'll be back. Until then, I will miss you. Type at you soon!
Scoop the poop, who has time?
I'm just now getting home from my first day of training at my job. I am pooped. I've been up since 7am. It didn't go all that bad. I do have a take home test to have ready by tomorrow at 4pm. WTF? Oh, and I have like a paragraph of bullshit to push meat to memorize by tomorrow also. FUN!!! All in all, it wasn't that bad. I was getting paid to eat crabcakes, artichoke dip, shrimp and artichoke pizza, and a fabulous piece of carrot cake for dessert. The only problem that I had was that I had to sit there for like 5 or was it 6 hours w/o a cigarette. Now, that sucked big hairy balls!
Desiree is the girl training me and she's a hoot. She'll tell you to fuck off in a minute. I like her for that. Anyway I wanted to post something that her 4 year old daughter asked her recently b/c I thought that it was funny as hell. Cheyanne, "Mom, why are people ugly?" Des said that she didn't quite know how to respond to that one. She just told her that some people were ugly and that some were pretty. I guess that is a good answer for a 4 year old, but I'd had to tell her that unfortunately, not all people are as blessed with beauty as we are. They are purdy!
was sent to me from T-Shirt Hell. The Swift Boat Veterans for Truth have been attacking John Kerry's war record. They say he doesn't deserve his medals. Kerry has responded by saying, "They can take away my medals, but they'll never take away my necklace of human ears, or my baby's skull my wife uses as an ashtray." Is that some funny shit or what? That's one of the reasons that I'm voting for this guy, he actually has a sense of humor. I like that in a man.
Scoop the poop or just let your loved ones do it for you!!!
Well, just let me start off by saying that it is raining like a mad bitch here and I've been out in it ALL freaking day. I just got home and I'm still soaked from like two hours ago.
I had many errands to run, since I start my new job tomorrow. The last errand to be run was at about 6pm. Just as I was leaving, it rained like the sky had dropped out. I took off my shoes and just ran my little ass to my Christopher as fast as my little legs would take me. I get into the car, it's leaking, of course! While running this errand, I could not see a DAMN thing. I couldn't see the road. I couldn't see the red lights. I couldn't see cars. I couldn't see a DAMN thing. Thank you, God, for getting Christopher and I home safely.
On another note, this is just a little update to let you know how I'm doing on my "quitting all things brown". (cokes, Dr. Pepper, coffee, tea, cigarettes, etc.) Basically, I sucking at this. My morning is still starting with my lovely coffee, but I do try to drink only one cup. I'm doing pretty good on the Cokes and Dr. Pepper. I'm now drinking like a gallon of sweet tea a day. (Hey, at least I'm drinking water. In a way!) The whole quitting smoking thing is REALLY hard. I find it hard not to smoke when EVERYONE around me is smoking. My biggest problem is sitting in front of my Precious and chain smoking. I decided today that instead of smoking 2 packs of Marlboro Lights a day that I'd go back to smoking Marlboro reds. Maybe that way, I'll smoke less. Right? Yeah!? Hey, people, I'm trying damn it!!! Hold on, let me light up. I'll be right back. Ok. I'm back. Heee!!!
If you love me than you'll do something for me. Pray for my friend's (Ana and Lynn) cat (Jude). He is very sick and just got out of the kitty hospital this afternoon. He seems to be doing lots better, but keep him in your prayers. M'kay! Thank you. Thank you very much!
Well, I guess that I'm off for my daily dose of soap crack. I'm fixing to go and put on something warm and fuzzy and pile up in the bed with Miss Tigger. Hope all of you had a nice and dry Monday, for I did not. It was nice, just not dry!
Scoop the poop, LATER!!!
Guns and Roses Rule!!!
Go ahead, comment. You know that you want to. I dare you. I double dog dare you, bitch!!!
Wonder Twins Activate!
I'm over at PS and Father O's place. They just left to go and "work out/pick up guys" with their trainer chic. PS and I went by our house today and just really got a feel for what needed to go where and what colors the rooms should be. We just got back from Home Depot and picked out some colors. Yippieee!!!
We've kinda got an idea of what we want to do. The house is a beige color with white trim. We like that. We are painting the front door red (VERY VERY RED) and also the porch swing to match. When you walk in the first room you enter is the livingroom. Right now it is a pale yellow and that's ok, but we're going to make it a more vibrant, brighter yellow. For my room, I'm going to have a more dull, red, color that I'm going to feather leaf with gold to give the whole room that crackled antique look. As for the bathroom, I think that we have both agreed on blue (like almost sapphire blue, but not) with white trim. For the kitchen, I suggested some kind of light pastel-like green colors to give it the whole retro look. It will also look purdy with all of the multi colored glass knick knacks and match well with my dining room table. I'm pretty sure that PS is going to paint each wall of his room a different color. That's cool! I just don't know if he knows what colors he wants to use.
While we were there, we found this room that we didn't even know we had. It's in the back of the house with the washer and dryer in a little room to the side. UMMMM!!!!!! Can we say ART STUDIO, people. The room is plenty big enough for us to both have plenty of room to paint. What a cool discovery! I'm sure that we would have eventually found it, but who knows how long that might have taken us? We were so silly today, but it was sweet. We were like a couple picking out paint for their house, but not! We did our first thing for the house thing today and it was special. Just like corn!!!
PS, I know you're reading, I can see you. If I forget to tell you, I think that we should paint the outside first. You know for the party and all. Let's just find out about the weather first. And I love you and your new haircut!
Scoop the poop with a colorful scooper!!!
I Need A Cigarette
I went to my oriantation for my new job today. That. Was. Fun!!! I'm now over at PS's getting anxious about painting our house. Painting our house, people, is making me anxious!!!!!!! Am I freaking having a melt down. There are just sooo many things that we have "to do". I'm just freaking out. One, two, three, four, (deep breath) five... Better already!!!
I thought of another one of my OCD's today. I must have lipstick, chapstick, lip-gloss, BURT'S BEESWAX (my fav-o-rite), lip balm, something. My lips must always have something on them. I didn't realize it until last night when I was going to bed. I had my glass of sweet tea, cigarettes, eye mask, BUT, WAIT!!! Where is my chapstick??? Fuck man, I left in the livingroom next to the computer. Man, I've already taken a before bed pee-pee, had the covers pulled back, started my Tivo, Tigger was getting settled in under the covers to get in "her spot" (with her head right in my face, the fur doesn't go well with the chapstick) Anyway, I was getting ready thinking, maybe I could just use one of the three or four in my purse. Getting more anxious, I got up and got my BURT'S and all was well! I know I'm fucking crazy. Tell me something that I DON't know!
I know on thing, if I were ever found dead, or simply wake up in a strange hospital room, I WILL have my pink lip-something on!!! I'll be just like my Grandmother. A lady never leaves the house without her lipstick on...
OK. Now I just have to type in two things that I've heard recently. You may have already heard them if so, hear them again. Whatever! I don't really care at this particular moment in time.
" I think that put an end to the jheri curl. Brothers everywhere were like, I got to take the juice out b/c grease and heat don't mix." Aries Spears
from MAD TV This was his response about Michael Jackson's hair catching on fire. Heee!!!
I thought it was funny and you do too, jedi mind control! (I'm waving my hand in front of you're face right now. I am.)
" I wish that I was inside your belly where I could knaw my way out!" Father O' Flannigan
said that to PS earlier and I had to have it as my own. It is now mine!!! Heee!!!!!!!!!!
Both of these boys make me laugh so hard sometimes that I' scared that I might have premature pee-pee!!!
Scoop the poop, though most of it is really pee-pee, ya' know!!!
Such A Swell Day!!!
Today has been the greatest day. I was really relaxed all day. I had a few places to go and try to get a new job. I went to the second place and got hired. I start tomorrow. Yippiee!!! Hooray for me!!! I'm really excited about the fact that I'll have somewhat of a steady means of cash. This makes me feel LOTS better about moving out. I feel as if 30 lbs. have been lifted from my shoulders.
I then went by a friend's house. She gave me a pair of pants to wear to work. You have to wear all black. The pants fit, but they are like 3 Ft too long. I know that I have a pair of black slacks. I remember buying them at Banana Republic b/c I actually found a pair of tan that fit (which is really hard for me) so I got them in every color. I mean, they fit everywhere. They were the only pants that I own, besides my jeans, that I don't have to have hemmed. OK. Enough about all of that.
I visited with Pepe earlier. He starts school tomorrow and is VERY nervous. I told him that everything would be fine. He just gets really stressed about stuff like this. I told him that I'd call him tomorrow after work and see how everything went. I hope it's all good! He'll be alright. I have all of the faith in the world in him, afterall, I do love him and always will.
I'm getting sleepy now and must go and watch my soaps the I recorded on the Tivo thing. I love that thing. I know, I'm pathetic, going to watch my soaps, but they are like crack. Like the "good shit" that Rick James would smoke!!! R.I.P. Super Freak!!!!!!!!!!!!
Scoop the poop and be happy!!!
Just you and me, Punk Rock Girl...
PS- "Are you high?" NN-"You know I'm not. I don't do stuff like that. By the way, you do know the 70's have BEEN over, right? Silly Faggot."
This is Preston. He's nakie.
Where's the bone structure.
Lil Pimpin (Note the Black Power Afro Pick)
Aren't we purty?!
Funny that you sent me that email, Tobey. I was dreaming about you to last night.
My what BIG hair you have!!
I'm Just Here To Supervise...
I'm over at what will soon be PS's old apt. He's over there doing some kind of Japanese computerized robot dance with the tele. It kinda like exercise. Once we move in together, I'm going to learn how to do it. PS and Father O' Flannigan are going to work out at the gym in the morning and I sooo want to go. I sooo need to go, BUT they are going at like 6am!!! 6am, people, WTF!?? Father O gets off from work at 6am. I guess that explains it. I may go. I may not, I'll let ya know because I KNOW that you really, really do care about me and my exercise.
PS has to go to the new place and finish painting his room. Hopefully
he's going to get in touch with a friend that is going to help me, well basically he's gonna do it, my walls. I want them to have colors like eggshell, light gold, beige, and something with a red tint all together. He does the faux finishes and is like totally awesome. I'd link a photo of what I want done, but I need PS to do that for I do not know the website and PS is far too busy shaking hiss ass off to help me now, but you get the picture. My bedspread is white with white embroidery on it. I have the sheets and dust ruffle to match. My pillows are beautiful. I used to be able to go and splurge on a new 3000 dollar bedroom suit, maybe again, someday when I get my shit together. Anyway, these pillows were 300 dollars, no shit! I'll post some pictures when we get moved in. They are white. One is square and covered in pearls. Two are square and covered with white crystals. They are sooo purdy!!! I love them and can't wait to set 'em up. I also have this huge gold mirror that is beautiful that I'll hang somewhere in there. For my dressers, which are now black, I'm going to paint them gold. Let it dry and then go over it with an eggshell color and then apply the crackle paint to give it that antique look. Hell, it is a freaking antique. I've had them all of my life. They are made from walnut and apparently can last a pretty darn long time. I have this big fake white orchid that I got at Pier 1 that I'm going to put on the smaller part of the dresser. For the top, I'll just put up my random knick knacks and photos. I might put the orchid on the coffeetable. Decisions, decisions!?!
We are both people that when they move into a new place that they are so pumped, crazy, anal, whatevah, but they have to have EVERYTHING unpacked and put in it's proper place. Pictures on the walls, candles lit, bathroom clean and lovely, all of it! Besides, PS's surprise b'day party that he's helping me plan is on the 6th so we need to hurry our asses up. We're both going out of town for a little while this week, but we do have work to get done.
My little Lexie is turning 3 years on Sunday and she loves her Auntie NN or is it just riding in Auntie NN's convertible? I must go see my girl. Hopefully, PS and I could work something out where we can take my car and he can drive and we just go together and accomplish all of our "to do list" by the end of the week. Stop laughing! It could happen, couldn't it? YES, it could and it will! OK! Don't doubt our ability to get our shit done!! You got that, bitch, don't doubt us!!!
I can't wait for us to move in together. I know that I keep saying that, but it's going to be so super!!! Anyway, PS and I have to go in there before the end of the month and start the whole painting and cleaning process. Then we have to decide where everything is going to go. I know we are using my very retro dining room set. PS's couch, loveseat and table will probably be in the living room. I have the same couch and loveseat, but mine aren't leather. They are a light blue material and VERY comfy. I'm just going to buy some couch and loveseat covers to go with everything and cover them up. It will look good, I hope.
Oh, the whole process of moving is starting to stress me out just thinking about it. I know that it will all be wonderful. That is that it will not be wonderful until all of the walls that need to be painted are painted, our artwork is hanging on the walls, our candles are everywhere, there is blue glass all over the kitchen, the front porch swing is painted, and the porch is closed in by bamboo blinds, and we have not one, but two Elvis dress up magnets on our refrigerator!
Scoop the poop in your new house!!!
Gotta Get Drunk
I just had to put a few, well two, funny quotes that I've heard in the last 24 hours. Here goes"
Last night I had the pleasure to watch 4 episodes of Will and Grace
. Jack (Sean Hayes) said the funniest thing that I've evah heard while trying to teach Karen to do the fox trot. He said, "Before language, people communicated through intricate choreography, costume changes, and lighting. Language was only invented when unattractive people were born and needed to be commented on."
Does that sound like something PS
would say or what? I about wet my pants when he said that!!!!
The next one here is from one of my fav-o-rite Willie Nelson songs called I Gotta Get Drunk. Willie says, "There's a lot of doctors that tell me I better start slowing it down, but there's more old drunks than there are old doctors, so I guess we better have another round!"
I just love that verse. It's soooo Willie. I've actually met him once. He's a very nice, short, drunk, pot-smoking man that will greet you with a kiss. (With his tongue!! Eww!) What was I to say, hey Willie, you could use some chapstick. He did give me his red bandana and a signed autograph, and a backstage pass for life. How cool is that? I'll Do an all about my love for Willie one day, but as Willie says, I gotta get drunk." I'm taking his advice this evening.
Scoop the poop and have an awesome weekend!!!
Our House Will Be A Very, Very, Very Fine House...
Ps and I went and looked at our house Sunday. It is 2 bedroom and one bathroom. I really love it b/c it is kinda out in the woods, but 10 minutes from everything. The pink kitchen is huge and our bathroom is amazing. There is just enough room in there for all of our beauty necessities. You know we gotta look pretty since we're both single. (We gots to gets us some REAL men up in there.) There is a lot of work that needs to be done before we move in. We need to clean, paint, etc. I think that once we get everything done that the place will be awesome, totally!
We have a front porch with a swing! Lovely!!! We are going to get some of those bamboo blinds and put around the whole porch area. We have one house next door to us, his brother and his wife. Well, she'll be his wife Friday. How awesome is that? We have a HUGE front and back yard. We even have a back porch. I can't hardly wait to see what this place looks like once we've moved our asses in and fixed it up. I will have to take some before and after photos for you. I know that I want to paint my room either an eggshell color or something crazy like red. Ummmm!!! I think that I'll stick to the eggshell. We have a washer and a dryer. COOL! Our rent, I think that I already told you about that, but this place could easily run for 800. EASY! We are so lucky.
I can't wait to live with PS. We can play on gay.com until all hours of the morning and make fun of ugly old gay men with their schriveled up wieners hanging out. (Like we did sun. Night.) We just have so much fun together. There are a few things that we need to talk about: like who gets the BIG bedroom? Heee!!! Me, of course. Just kidding, PS. I just need to talk to him about Tigger's safety. I plan on keeping her food, water, and litter box in my room. NOT that I don't trust PS with my pussy, but OH. MY. GOD. If there were to be someone over that didn't know that she was an INSIDE cat and let her out, I would find them, kill them and then myself. I do plan on getting locks put on my door. Not to keep PS out, but like when I'm gone, Tigger will be locked safely in my room with all of her things. I'm soooo not worried about PS letting her out. I'm just worried that some drunken idiot (his friend or mine) would be like, "hey, kitty, wanna go outside? Ok. Bye!" I would DIE!!! Though, I don't think that we'll have all that many visitors. People here tend to not want to drive out of a certain area. We are definitely out of that area and I love it!!! I think that the most visitors that we will have will be for PS's b'day/house warming party. It will rock, buy the way and most of you are invited, but you must b.y.o.g. (bring your own gift) or no entry to you. HA!
PS, if you're reading and I know you are b/c you are at work bored as hell, I just read your last entry about this girl that you loved so much and my conceited ass thought that you'd finally professed your love for me until I got to the bottom and it said BEA ARTHUR!!! I wanted to cry, but I'm so over it now. Did you tell Calvin Happy Birthday? If not, oh well, it's here on my blog. He can't say that I wasn't thinking of him today. You, Mr. PS need to profess your love for your future housewife. Heee!!! I love you, and yes, I have been drinking and have a Leopold in bed waiting for me, so what the fuck am I doing here? TTFN
HAPPY BIRTHDAY CALVIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Scoop the poop and may all of your wishes come true!!!
Would You Kill Me Or Take Me Fishing?
I said that I was going to write about some of my OCD's, but most of these are just things that simply just get on my nerves. I guess that some of them could be classified as an OCD. Whatevah!!! Oh, yeah, and I do have a few other things to write about. I'm REALLY sun burned and REALLY tired, so bear with me. Here goes nothing:
I guess this one is an OCD, but it REALLY gets on my nerves. When I smoke a cigarette and I'm done with it; I have to make sure that it is completely out. I hate it when I'm around others that smoke and just push their cig. down into the ash tray. NO. IT IS NOT OUT! I will literally go and put it out properly myself. I just hate that little shit string of smoke that just burns until it is ,in fact, COMPLETELY out. I'm anal,crazy,looney,bitchy,loving, and everything else. I know!!!
When I'm at home and I smoke, I have to go and brush my teeth when I'm done and wash my hands b/c I can't stand the smell. I also don't want nasty breath. I even carry a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse. You know, just in case. You never know when you may be in a situation where you NEED to brush your teeth. I also carry like 3 packs of the little Listerine pocket packs and I've ALWAYS got some gum that tastes like Vick's vapo-rub smells. Bad breath is just gross! There is no excuse for it. None at all!!!
I always have to wash my hands after using the restroom as I'm (hopefully) sure that all of you do the same. The one thing is that I hate public restrooms. I don't even like to touch the little flusher thing. God only knows what kind of germs are on it. After I wash, in a public restroom, I also use my anti-bacterial handy wipes. (Which are also in the purse.) Then I start thinking about things. Like, say your eating Mexican with a group of friends and your all sharing chips. One person gets up to use the restroom. They come back and eat more chips, BUT did they wash their hands? I don't know, so no chips for me, thanks!
I like to try my damnest to make definite plans. You know, we're doing this
time. DEFINITELY! Then someone runs late or something happens, I freak. Then, the more people call me and ask to make definite plans, it freaks me out to the point where I don't even want to leave the house. There has just been too much drama put upon a simple plan and I can't deal, but I'm really trying to work on it. I know you'll all sleep better tonight knowing this!
Another thing that gets on my nerves, as I'm sure they get on yours, are two faced people. I mean, really people, don't pretend to like someone just for the sake of pretencious bullshit. I hate these people. I have more respect for people that, like if someone doesn't like you, they let you know. Be real, people. I'd much rather someone call me a bitch to my face or say that they simply do not like me rather than someone hug my neck and then throw the dagger as soon as my back is turned. That's bullshit and it makes you a total pussy! (Whether you're male or female.)
On a happier note, PS has promised that he would kill me. (I know this would make some of you happy. Sorry, no time soon!) I'd asked Pepe the other day that if I were ever to be in an accident and be paralyzed from the neck down, would he smother me and put me out of my misery? He then looked at me like I was crazy (which I proudly am), and said "hell no!" I then asked the family and basically got the same response. THEN
, I said to myself PS would do it for me. I asked him and he said that he would if he ever had to. Now, guys, that's a best friend. Anyone that would be willing to kill you. You better hold on to them! That is just one of the many
reasons the PS is my best friend!!!
On a burned side of things, I went fishing yesterday. I cast my rod out almost as soon as we got in the lake. As soon as my very sparkley lure hit the water, I got a bite. I was reeling and reeling as fast as I could. The tip was all of the way down to the water. As I was trying to get the bass in, SNAP
, the graphite rod broke in half. But, man this bass had a head bigger than mine. I know that he must have weighed like 20lbs or something like that. We, well Pepe, didn't let that stop him from fishing. He caught a few, but not one big enough to break his rod. Anyway, we were out there for something like 4 or 5 hours with NO sunscreen! Pepe, he tans, so he's ok. Me, I burn, B-A-D and burn I did. I can barely move today. I have rubbed aloe vera all over my burn. It helps, if you do it constantly and I had other things to do like paint my nails. You can see exactly where my shirt was and my shorts. I look crazy naked! Heee!!! As soon as I got home from our fishing trip, I took a cold bath. I then put lotion all over the burn. I wasn't even going to attempt to shave my legs. (That is another one of my OCD's, I must always have smooth legs.) I think that when I get home tonight, I will try my best to shave them. Say a little prayer that I may shave my legs without too much pain from my burn. Ok!!!
Scoop the poop, but not too much!!!
My How Your Hair Can Change In 20 Years!!!
Here are just some funny photos for y'all to look at. I hope that you get a big laugh out of some of them, but not all. I'll be back with a new entry asap. I have a few OCD's that I've been writing down. Just a few, well, a lot of little things that bother the hell out of me. Anyway, I'll post later!
Scoop the poop, tomorrow!!!
This picture was taken in 1984, my how ever could you tell? Anyway, this is my coool uncle C, Mom, HH, and myself with the Easter Bunny. You can just look at me and tell that I was going to grow up to be a BAD little girl! Thanks for the photo,C. I love you!!! This is the coool uncle that is always nice enough to let me use his computer (even when he doesn't want to!)
This is the "new" haircut. I hope that all of you love it. No, really, I really don't give a shit what you think, but I love it. I can just wash it, put some gel in, and go! It does look a little crazy, but, hey, I just got out of my car with the top down. That was one of the main reasons for the cut. I love not having "hat head" anymore!!!
I just had to put this one on here b/c this is usually how I look, "CRAZY!!!"
I'm over at PS's apt. taking pictures. I just wanted to post this one. We are future "Roomates with Dates!!!" Yippie!!!